inarticulate speech of the heart

Day 3

2011-03-01T17:03:00.003-05:00

A picture of the cast of my favorite tv show:

I'll admit, it was tough to decide between Parenthood, Sons of Anarchy, and Modern Family. When it all comes down to it, Parenthood takes the cake.

Day 2 (3) I already Fail

2011-03-01T09:28:00.003-05:00

Day 2 - A picture of myself and the person I've been closest to the longest...

For some reason I couldn't edit Caleb out of the picture (sorry Caleb, not that you'll see this). I thought it was a fun picture of Isaac and I. Having moved twice, once after 5th grade and again after 8th, my friends changed a lot but I always had my brother. We used to spend a lot of time together and talk about everything. Obviously college, me getting married, and living in two different towns will change that but I'd like to think we're still good friends. I know I could call him any time if I ever needed anything and I hope he knows he could do the same. Welp, that's about all I have to say about that.

60 Day Challenge

2011-02-27T15:13:00.002-05:00

Maybe this will help me start blogging again...
Fifteen Facts
1. I am the mother of a precious little banana bug, Anna Jane.
2. I am married to a goofiest goofster, Drew, who I love dearly.
3. If I have one current regret in life it's having a college degree from the wonderful, Huntington University, and not using it. Looking to change that...
4. I slept with a teddy bear until I got married.
5. A box of Kraft Mac and Cheese and a giant glass of 2% milk are about all it takes to make me happy.
6. I hate my cell phone.
7. One of my favorite snacks is a piece of dark chocolate with a pile of peanut butter on top.
8. I love living in Fort Wayne.
9. I really enjoy spending time alone but I am so thankful for the amazing group of friends I gained marrying Drew. Couldn't ask for a better group of people!
10. I hate talking on the phone.
11. I am determined to fit into my favorite Banana Rep. jeans before next winter even if I only zip them up for a second, look in the mirror, and have to take them off because of extreme discomfort.
12. I am not a big sweets eater but I will totally spend the extra dollar or two on the good ice cream. Current fav: Breyer's Mint Chocolate Chip.
13.I'm having a hard time thinking of three more things.
14. I often wish that I was the same bubbly, annoyingly happy girl that I was until after High School. I'm fairly certian that I can pinpoint what changed me and if I could go back in time I would totally take it back. I have regrets and I don't necessarily think that everything happens for a reason. Sometimes we just make bad choices.
15. I love to grocery shop.

June 7th, 2010

2010-04-25T16:50:00.003-04:00

People may start asking what I would like for my birthday this year. I've been thinking about it for a while and I think I have a finished list. I always tend to forget when I'm asked - like my mind goes blank when I'm put on the spot...or something.

1- Toms Shoes

I'm aware that they're out of stock. I also like the olive color but they don't have my size (6) currently available. I would take a gift card.

2- Subscription to Food Network Magazine

3- A hanging file cabinet

This one wouldn't have to be new - or necessarily even this particular cabinet. I'm just wanting at least two drawers.

4 - 5 pound weights - 2 of them

Not necessarily these specific weights but just 5 pound dumbbell weights.

5 - A house :)...okay, I don't want anyone to buy us a house (unless you were already planning on it, haha). But our lease ends in October and so we need to start looking at where we're headed next so money is always appreciated. :)

much love.
carrie

Dear God,

2009-07-07T15:55:00.001-04:00

A lot of people have died lately. That blows for us still here...

much love.
carrie jade

p.s. time to bust out the Valley Song again.

Kinda Neat

2009-06-19T08:55:00.003-04:00

I follow Huntington University on Twitter and finally got curious enough about something they were "tweeting" about to investigate.

A while back some students created a video called "After Hours". It was filmed int he Huntington Courthouse and won some award and has since been submitted to a few contests. You can see it here:

The only person involved with the film that I know personally is Lance Clark - he's a professor there, a very good one at that.

If the star of the film looked familar, "and you think he can dance", he can also be seen here:

So he didn't actually go to Huntington, but that's still pretty cool, I think.

Read here for HU's press release.

much love.
carrie jade

live

2009-05-08T13:51:00.004-04:00

I'm going to see this band next Saturday in Fort Wayne. The keyboard man is one of Drew's best friend's older brothers. I'm pretty excited...

http://

another:

http://

what's one more?

http://

Dad - I really think you'd like this so I'm sending you an invite on facebook :) I think you'll like the last link best. At least I do...

much love,
carrie jade

in ah rest in

2009-04-24T09:32:00.003-04:00

The seminary at which I work recently started working with the Missionary Church's PLI program so that they will be able to offer Bachelor and Master's level degrees to their graduates through WTS. That being said, I received their Spring 2009 newsletter this morning and found the opening paragraph interesting:

Not long ago Bill Bright, founder of Campus Crusade for Christ and the Global
Pastors Network, published the following statistics derived from polling pastors
across denominational lines:

1500 pastors leave the ministry each month due to moral failure, spiritual burnout, or contention in their churches.

4000 new churches begin each year, but over 7000 churches will close.

95% of pastors do not regularly pray with their spouses.

90% of pastors said their seminary or Bible school training did only a fair to poor job preparing them for ministry.

90% said ministry was completely different from what they expected.

80% of seminary and Bible school graduates who enter the ministry will leave the ministry within the first five years.

80% of pastors’ spouses feel their spouse is overworked.

80% of adult children of pastors surveyed have had to seek professional help for depression.

80% of pastors (and 84% of their spouses) feel unqualified and discouraged in their role as pastors.

80% of pastors surveyed spend less than 15 minutes in prayer daily.

70% of pastors constantly fight depression.

70% of pastors do not have a close friend, confidant, or mentor.

70% said the only time they spend studying the Word is when they are preparing their sermons.

70% felt God called them to pastoral ministry before entering ministry, but only 50% still felt called after three years in ministry.

50% Are so discouraged that they would leave the ministry if they could, but have no other way to make a living.

50% of pastors’ marriages will end in divorce.

40% (almost) of pastors polled said they have had an extramarital affair since beginning their ministry.

So, either these statistics are completely discouraging or they're comforting to those pastors out there who comfortably fit into these statistics.

I think it raises two questions: 1. What are our seminaries doing wrong and/or missing? and 2. What can our denominational leaders do to address these needs of their pastors?

I personally would reccomend that mentors become a large part of seminary education (something the PLI program seems to emphasize, and the direction I feel WTS it moving towards). I would also suggest that more practical continuing education type events be held (either by denominations, seminaries, or third parties) that address areas such as burnout, balancing family and ministry, maintianing a healthy marriage in ministry, spiritual formation, depression, and specifically for my denomination: how to be a pastor who does it all (i.e. rural churches with little to no support staff). Maybe it's as simple as organizing support groups who reading books together, or creating online communities, I don't know.

And, as always, I will point out that we know little to nothing about how the survey was conducted. Who was surveyed? How many people? What qualified someone to be surveyed? What questions were asked? We all know that the questions themselves can scew the way a person answers, as well as knowing why they're being asked. There are several factors to a survey like this that can make the statistics completely worthless. However, I think there's some truth here regardless.

for what it's worth,
Carrie Jade

The Valley Song

2009-04-13T14:57:00.002-04:00

My supervisor's brother was killed yesterday. He was driving his motorcycle and was hit by a 19 year old girl.

After my lunch break I was jammin to Jars of Clay and heard this song. Jars of Clay music means a lot to me for a variety of reasons that maybe I will disclose at some other time. Anyway, The Valley Song came on and I decided that I want it played at my funeral instead of having the 23 Psalm read. Not that it's better than scripture but I just like it. Anyway, here's the video

And here are the lyrics:

You have led me to the sadness
I have carried this pain
On a back bruised, nearly broken
I'm crying out to you

I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy

When death like a Gypsy
Comes to steal what I love
I will still look to the heavens
I will still seek your face

But I fear you aren't listening
Because there are no words
Just the stillness and the hunger
For a faith that assures

I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy

I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy

Alleluia, alleluia
Alleluia, alleluia

While we wait for rescue
With our eyes tightly shut
Face to the ground using our hands
To cover the fatal cut

And though the pain is an ocean
Tossing us around, around, around
You have calmed greater waters
Higher mountains have come down

I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy

Yeah

Alleluia, alleluia
Alleluia, alleluia

Alleluia, alleluia alleluia, alleluia
Alleluia, alleluia alleluia, alleluia

I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy

I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy

I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy

I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy

Oh, Lord sing of Your mercy,
Mercy
Your mercy

much love.

25

2009-01-26T17:27:00.002-05:00

I've been thinking about doing this for some time. I'm not sure why...it's a facebook thing so I'm breaking all the rules but posting on my blog but I'm just a rebel like that.

Rules: once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you . at the end, choose 25 people to be tagged . you have to tag the person who tagged you . if i tagged you, it’s because i want to know more about you... was told to tag 25 different people...

1. I keep Cranberry juice jugs full of filtered water under my desk. There are currently 3 empty ones, 1 full one, and 1 almost gone. I try to drink one a day.

2. I have weird eating habits. On Monday I get hungry for something and then I eat it once a day for almost an entire week - sometimes two. Last week it was caesar salad, this week it's feeling like Tostitos Party Pizzas (not nearly as healthy).

3. I read more often than I watch tv.

4. I touch my face when I read. That sounds a lot creepier than it actually is.

5. I crave my grandma's spanish rice almost once a week (at least) and then I get really sad and a lot of times I cry about it.

6. I recently started collecting crosses. I have 3. One is from my parents, they got it at Ten Thousand Villages. The other two were on clearance at Hobby Lobby and for some reason I think that's humorous - in a dry sense of humor way.

7. Royal Tennenbaums is my favorite movie and I can almost say it word for word.

8. I recently started putting tomatos and mayo on my grilled cheese sandwhiches.

9. I could eat macaroni and cheese every day for the rest of my life and not complain. Even if I was restricted to the Blue box.

10. I drink a glass of milk with a straw every night before bed, Monday thru Thursday, and also on Sunday.

11. I can't sleep if I can see an open door.

12. Worms and beans are the two most discusting things on this planet, in my opinion, and the sight of them makes be want to vomit. Always.

13. After I work out for a decent amount of time I crave two things: crunch wrap supremes and double cheese burgers from McDonalds.

14. I quit drinking vanilla lattes unless someone else is buying. If you've known me for the past 5 years you know this is a dramatic change in my life.

15. The Giver is my favorite book and has been since 4th grade when I read it in Mrs. Throneburg's class. I don't think I grasped the concept at all back then but I kept reading it and it get's better every time.

16. I don't really enjoy chick flick movies but I really enjoy reading chick flick books.

17. I also like to read books about religion.

18. If I don't go to church on Sunday my week is impossible.

19. I live 90 miles away from my boyfriend and it's stupid.

20. I have worn the same jewelry every day since I graduated college - with the exception of maybe a week total.

21. A majority of my friends are in their 50s. It's very beneficial but I forget how to interact with people my own age.

22. I still sleep with a teddy bear, Oatmeal, but I no longer require it.

23. My mom and I have this strange connection of almost always scheduling our haircuts on the same day (or a day apart) without knowing it. Then we get to have breakfast that morning and go to Ann Taylor afterwards. One of my favorite ways to spend a day.

24. I don't ever want a big house. Just comfortably small.

25. One of the best pieces of advice I was ever given was to dry off my toothbrush with a towel after I brush my teeth. life changing. try it.

There ya go. I'm glad we shared this moment. Feel free to do the same, I enjoy reading these things :)

much love.

removal

2009-01-21T11:53:00.002-05:00

I'm taking this quote off of my facebook profile and wanted it to be stored somewhere safe.

Greg Boyd, "The Myth of A Christian Nation" (p. 48-49):
"Our battle is "not against flesh and blood" (Eph. 6), whether they are right wing or left wing, gay or straight, pro-choice or pro-life, liberal or conservative, democratic or communist, American or Iraqi. Our battle is against the "cosmic powers" that hold these people, and all people, in bondage. Whatever our own opinions about how the kingdom of the world should run, whatever political or ethical views we may happen to embrace, our one task as kingdom-of-God disciples is to fight FOR people, and the way we do it is by doing exactly what Jesus did. He defeated the cosmic powers of darkness by living a countercultural life characterized by outrageous love and by laying down his life for his enemies. So too, we contribute to the demise of the "power over" principalities that hold people in bondage when we refrain from judgment of others and rather extend grace to them, when we let go of anger toward others and instead "come under" them in loving service."

Need to finish this later

2008-12-19T15:37:00.002-05:00

I need to finish this article by Brian McClaren about the Warren/Obama Drama later on.

Good quote so far:

If we dig in our heels and stand firm in our warring camps - left and right, pro-choice and pro-life, blah blah blah - we're insane if we expect to get different results from the ones we've been getting. Nothing will change.

But what might happen if we begin to reach out ... seeking the common good ... seeking to build bridges rather than bombs ... seeking to throw out invitations rather than insults ... making friends of former enemies ... admitting we're rethinking and changing rather than defending the orthodox no-rethinking-zones in which we've been raised?

much love.

Christmas Song

2008-12-05T09:39:00.002-05:00

I apologize for those of you who thought my blog was worth reading. Just a collection of things for me. :)

This just might be my favorite Christmas song this year (generally Oh Holy Night). I found it via Pandora Radio. Please watch the video at the end. The introduction is priceless. :) I'm not sure if Dave Matthews wrote it or just sings it but here she goes:

Christmas Song

She was his girl, he was her boyfriend
Shed be his wife, and make him her husband.
A surprise on the way any day any day
One healthy little giggling, dribbling baby boy
The wisemen came, three made their way
To shower him with love while he lay in the hay
Shower him with love, love, love
Love,love,love
Love,love was all around.

Not very much of his childhood was known
Kept his mother mary worried always out on his own
He met another mary, who for a reasonable fee,
Less than reputable was known to be
His heart was full of love, love, love
Love, love, love
Love, love was all around.

When jesus christ nailed to his tree
Said oh daddy-o, I can see how it all soon will be
I came to shed a little light on this darkening sea
Instead I fear Ive spilled the blood of my children all around
The blood of my children all around
The blood of my childrens all around.
So Im told, so the story goes
The people he knew were less than golden-hearted
Gamblers and robbers,
Drinkers and jokers, all soul searchers
Like you and me, like you and me
Rumors insisted that he soon would be
For his deveations taken into custody
By the authorities, less informed than he
Drinkers and jokers, all soul searchers
Searching for love, love, love
Love, love, love
Love, love was all around.

Preparations were made for a celebration day
He said eat this bread but think of it as me
Drink this wine and dream it will be the blood of our children all around
The blood of our children all around
The blood of our children all around
Father up above
Why in all this hatred do you fill me up with love, love, love
Love, love, love
Love, love is all around.

Father up above
Why in all this hatred do you fill me up with love, fill me love, love, yeah
Love, love, love
Love, love, and the blood of our children all around.

much love,
carrie jade

don't forget what its all about

Rejoice and Lament

2008-10-02T15:08:00.003-04:00

This may be my favorite song:

Rejoice and Lament
Josh Garrels

Learn this lesson well, my friend
There’s a time to rejoice and lament
Every season will find an end
All will fade and be made new again

Standing on the rocks of the railroad tracks
Feet calloused, eyes open, sun beats on my back
As I gaze upon the unseen winds

And they are wandering, whispering
Wisdom that’s eternal
From the heart to the mind
To the hand to the journal
Now the kernel of the seeds in the cleft of the rock
And it’s watered by the winds
Having power to unlock and
Stop the clock of chronological logic
With its homogenized systems
That are dead and can’t dodge it
Being deaf to the voice of the Almighty One

Spirit illumines the dark like a fire
Revealing the way that was hidden but is higher
Now we must travel on the wings
That will never grow tired
Of searching the mysteries of God
I said Father the feathers of my wax wings
Fall away by the rising of the sun
And I have descended when I was undone
And I will ascend when your Spirit comes

Because what’s been done and overcome
Cannot be stopped by the power of any human
Like the number of sand we will stand
And we will fall, all
In the face of an eternal call
But those who call on His name
In the midst of the pain
In the guilt and the shame
And the world full of blame
And all the bloody stains
From the unjust gains
I learned all men suffer the same

Because we’re wayward sons
And all our jokes betray
Our foolish hearts and our selfish ways
But if we would turn to the Father’s grace
We would never be the same

This is an unseen land of a devastated soul
That’s prepared in contemplative silence
For the mighty working hand of an unseen Lord
To come restore this land from its violence

I said walk another mile

Stare across the fields of grain

This is how the prophets train

Learn this lesson well my friend
There’s a time to rejoice and lament
Every season will find an end
All will fade and be made new again

Josh's Blog
Josh's Website
His Myspace

Yay!

2008-09-26T17:04:00.001-04:00

I haven't watched this yet but I met my song is in there somewhere (I think there's like 15 parts to the concert video) :)

Hold Me Jesus

2008-09-26T17:00:00.002-04:00

I've been thinking about this song a lot lately. I really wish I had a video of my dad singing it (cause that's my favorite) - or at the very least a live version of Rich. But this will do...

2 things

2008-09-25T09:33:00.003-04:00

First - a link to a cnn article.

I think this is very interesting. By no means to I think this idea provides ideal living conditions but it proves that an inovative way of thinking can really change a lot of people's lives for the good. I'm not sure how it will all develop but I like what I see. Anyway, click here to see what I'm talking about.

Next, a picture I took from a fellow HU alumni's facebook. I'm not sure what the rules are on doing this but I think she'd be okay with it.

On the right side of the picture is a prayer wall that her and her roommates have in their home. I really REALLY like this. I think it's a creative means of functional art. I'm on the hunt for a tapestry (is that what it's called) now. I think this would be a neat thing for Sunday School classes to do...hint, hint. :) I like it because it's much different thant he typical prayer drop box method. It forces the user to creatively display what they're praying for.

Anyway - that's all.

much love,
carrie jade

Relativism

2008-09-24T13:35:00.000-04:00

I need to finish this later...

I want some

2008-09-18T09:49:00.002-04:00

Pretty sad, ridiculous and comical (in a way).

the glasses

My new 'it' topic.

2008-08-20T10:29:00.001-04:00

.

2008-08-08T09:29:00.001-04:00

Have you ever stopped to think about everything you had to go through to get where you are today? Not even just the big events, but the unexplainable ones that are only available through hindsight.

Tonight I am missin' you
Oh, tonight I am missin' you
In the light of day
I had lost my way
An' tonight I am missing you
Never thought I would come this far
I never thought I would come this far
I have come through such pain
In the strenth of your Name
Never thought I would come this far
I am a long. long way from my home
I am a long, long way from my home
I've been a pilgrim on this earth
Since the day of my birth
I'm a long way from my home
Tonight I'm sittin' on this porch in the rain
Tonight I'm sittin' on this porch in the rain
But Hallelujah by and by
I will meet you in the sky
I'm still a long, long way from home
-Glenn Kaiser, "Long Way From My Home"

Thanks dad. As if I needed another tear jerker song to add to my list of favorites. :)

much love,
carrie jade

Favor to ask

2008-07-30T17:19:00.001-04:00

Do you have $2800 you would like to give Drew and I so that we can go to Sweden?

Didn't think so, maybe next time.

Thanks for playing the game.

.

2008-07-09T08:37:00.002-04:00

It appears this blog is becoming a collection of news articles. Nonetheless, here's another.

Atheist Soldier sues Army

There are a lot of things I would like to say but I'm not going to. 1. I don't know who all reads this and 2. I need to collect my thoughts a bit more.

There are a lot of things I would like to discuss today but I don't have the time. For example, I've been learning a lot through students from a new responsibility at work. My discussions with them are confidential which is sad in part because I would like to give them credit for the amazingly brilliant things I've heard. Also, Warren Jeffs had to be taken to the hospital from an Arizona Jail. Police can't say why but my guess is either another attempt at suicide or brutal assult from fellow inmate(s). Either way - sad. Some kid in Texas sent a LSD laced snacks to a bunch of police stations claiming they were from Mothers Against Drunk Driving - sad. I'm reading "The Kite Runner" - mixed emotions. The professor who brought in the toaster at work took the toaster with him as he's getting ready to head back to California. I have to cook my frozen waffles in the microwave and they are S-O-G-G-Y!

Anyway, there's that. What does religious freedom even mean in this country?

much love,
carrie jade

SALAD DRESSING!!!

2008-07-02T09:30:00.002-04:00

I found this article humorous this morning:

Jul 2, 8:33 AM EDT

EPA: Salad dressing runoff floods Ohio homes

COLUMBUS, Ohio (AP) -- An Ohio EPA official says creamy ranch dressing mixed with sewage and storm runoff in the flooded basements of at least 10 Columbus homes.

Sewage from T. Marzetti Co., a Columbus-based salad dressing maker, overwhelmed the Columbus storm-sewer system during heavy rains last week. A resident reported the problem to the state's Environmental Protection Agency on Tuesday.

The EPA's Michael Dalton says the agency suspects that the factory's pipes merge with nearby homes, but aren't wide enough to handle extra water during a storm.

Neighbors have complained to the EPA over the last 30 years about discharges from the city sewage line that serves Marzetti into a creek. A company representative wouldn't comment on Monday.

---

Information from: The Columbus Dispatch, http://www.dispatch.com

On a more serious note, Findlay, the town where I live, has gotten some really really negative press lately. Read here what the Washington Post had to say about us.

Of course, the next day, everyone quoted in the article took back what they said claiming they had been misquoted. I can't find an electronic version of the editorial that appeared in yesterday's Findlay paper but it was quite sad. I feel as if the Washington Post article was slightly biased (but come on people, what newspaper isn't?) however, I would say that a majority of people in this town would have responded to the writer's questions the same way if they didn't know it would become national news. People keep saying, "just because Findlay's poluation is 95% white doesn't mean were racist", or "there are so many international students at our univeristy, we're not racist". Get a clue people. I would like to know how many people in this town have ever talked to an international student.

Don't get me wrong, I'd say a lot of the little towns back around where I'm from in Indiana would beat Findlay out in a racism contest in no time. But just because you don't treat people of other races poorly doesn't mean you're off the hook. I think this town is definitely all about preserving the status quo and in doing so it doesn't extend a warm welcome to non-white people - it doesn't provide an environment in which non-white people can feel comfortable or at home. I do think that a lot of people here are resistant to change. I think this town tries really hard to mask the reality of people in need. I think a lot of people do look down on non-white folks in this town but a lot of that has to do with lack of exposure and/or experience (even in 2008).

I like Findlay though. The lack of diveristy outside of the University's campus can be strange sometimes but I always wanted to move back to this town after living here for my Jr. High days. I think there are a lot of really good people in this town who just need a bit of time to adjust to things.

And for the record, if you read the article, have you ever heard the rumor that Obama was gay? The other rumors I've heard several times but not the gay thing. I even had a student here tell me that he was the Anti-Christ.

November is going to be an interestig month my friends. And this post kind of bounces all over the place, sorry.

much love,
Carrie Jade

Oh man

2008-06-24T11:57:00.002-04:00

The following article appeared on cnn.com this morning:

June 24, 2008
Dobson accuses Obama of 'distorting' Bible
Posted: 11:09 AM ET

From CNN Ticker Producer Alexander Mooney

Dobson takes aim at Obama on his radio show.
(CNN) — One of the country's leading evangelical leaders is accusing Barack Obama of deliberately distorting the Bible and taking a "fruitcake interpretation" of the U.S. Constitution.

In comments to be aired on his radio show Tuesday, Focus on the Family founder James Dobson criticizes the presumptive Democratic presidential nominee for comments he made in a June 2006 speech to the liberal Christian group renewal.

WATCH Dobson says Obama has a "fruitcake interpretation" of the Constitution

In the two-year old speech, Obama suggests it would be impractical to govern based solely on the word of the Bible, noting some passages suggest slavery is permissible and eating shellfish is disgraceful.

"Which passages of scripture should guide our public policy?" Obama asks in the speech. "Should we go with Leviticus, which suggests slavery is okay and that eating shellfish is an abomination. Or we could go with Deuteronomy which suggests stoning your child if he strays from the faith or should we just stick to the Sermon on the Mount."

"So before we get carried away, let's read our Bible now," Obama also said to cheers. "Folks haven't been reading their Bible."

In the comments to be aired later Tuesday, Dobson said Obama should not be referencing antiquated dietary codes and passages from the Old Testament that are no longer relevant to the teachings of the New Testament.

"I think he's deliberately distorting the tradition understanding of the Bible to fit his own worldview, his own confused theology," Dobson said, later adding that Obama is "dragging biblical understanding through the gutter."

Responding to the comments, Obama's National Director of Religious Affairs, Joshua DuBois, said the Illinois senator is "committed to reaching out to people of faith and standing up for American families."

"A full reading of his 2006 Call to Renewal speech shows just that," DuBuois also said. "Obama is proud to have the support of millions of Americans of faith and looks forward to working across religious lines to bring our country together."

Dobson also takes aim at the senator from Illinois for suggesting in the speech that those motivated by religion should attempt to appeal to broader segments of the population by not just framing their arguments around religious precepts.

Dobson said the suggestion is an attempt to lead by the "lowest common denominator of morality."

"Am I required in a democracy to conform my efforts in the political arena to his bloody notion of what is right with regard to the lives of tiny babies?" he said. "What he's trying to say here is unless everybody agrees, we have no right to fight for what we believe."

"What the senator is saying there, in essence, is that 'I can't seek to pass legislation for example that bans partial birth abortion, because there are people in the culture who don't see that as a moral issue," Dobson also said. "And if I can't get everyone to agree with me, than it is undemocratic to try, to pass legislation that I find offensive to the scripture. Now that is a fruitcake interpretation of the Constitution."

Dobson's comments follow the Obama campaign's recent efforts to increase its appeal among the evangelical community, many of whom have expressed reservations about supporting presumptive Republican nominee Sen. John McCain. Dobson himself has said he will not vote for the Arizona senator.

Several comments followed the post and most of them were in support of Obama. I'm not a big Dobson fan, never have been, but what is his point? If he was trying to make Obama look bad by bringing up something he said in the past, I think it's really back lashed against himself, and made mainstream Christianity look pretty bad.

A lot of people associate James Dobson and Focus on the Family with Christianity as a whole. I think most people would be surprised at the number of Christians who oppose Dobson these days, but this whole thing just made me really sad.

And people wonder why 'us kids' would rather call ourselves 'followers of Jesus' than Christians. Some nasty connotations come with the word 'Christian' today. I just can't decide if it's better to dissociate with the word, or try and redefine it.

Anyway, that really pushed my buttons this morning. I agree with one of the commenter's that I don't want to learn about being a follower from my president, I'll leave that to my pastor.

much love,
carrie jade

Check it out now...

2008-06-10T17:30:00.002-04:00

Turns out my good ole' Alma Mater (or whatever) has this really cool website for prospective students. Click on things and check out the stories:

Youniversity

Also, it turns out that some new Church of God missionaries, who are also fellow HU alumni, will have their pictures posted on the site soon enough. For a sneak preview, check out the Sarver's blog, here.

Sorry my blogging has been lame-o lately. Turns out people have actually been reading and so most of my thoughts are being written in one of those old fashioned journal type things. :) Oh, and I don't have the internet at home anymore. :(

much love.
carrie jade

La de da de daaaaa

2008-04-30T20:11:00.003-04:00

It's about that time again - the kind of time where I sit down, think about my life, and write something somewhat personal.

A few updates:

1 - Something cool happened at work. I mentioned to the right people that I was interested in doing development work. Last week I found out that I'll get one day a week for starters. I'm not sure exactly what this will look like as the people I need to sit down with are pretty busy with other changes going on. I'm super excited as this is something I have been thinking about for a long time. During my time at Huntington, it was often suggested that I go into sales. But what would I sell? Come to find out, I'm pretty passionate about education and I just happen to work for an education institute. One that has a lot of amazing characteristics. One that seeks to help equip folks for spreading the love of God. It's not exactly a sales job, but I'm definitely pumped to get some blessed folks on board with this place that I'm so passionate about. **side-note: Miss Joan, I hope that eventually, once I actually start this line of work, I'll be able to learn a lot from you! :)

2 - I'm going to Austin, TX in 28 days with Mr. Drew Feipel. There are two big reasons (texas after all) that I'm especially excited about this trip. First, my love has never been west of Chicago. I'm not exactly the most experienced traveler in the world but I consider myself fortunate to get to experience this with him (thanks again mom and dad, for making this easier to manage). Second, we'll be spending our time in Austin with two of my favorite memories growing up, my cousins Joe and Laura. I spent an enormous amount of time with these two during my elementary school years and I value our time together as adults just as much.

3 - I'm all registered for classes this fall and can't wait to get back into the classroom. I've got until September but that's okay.

4 - I found out yesterday that I will be getting new cupboards in the kitchen as well as a build in microwave and most importantly a DISHWASHER!! Doing dishes in the evening is somewhat therepeutic but I'm alright with being relieved of the duty. Coolest part is that my rent is even going to go up!

5 - I try not to get too personal on my blog because you just never know who might be reading but I get really really excited when I think about my best friend. I know ya'll don't know the whole story but it's always exciting to see someone you care a whole lot about get their life back on track because they want to and not because they're being forced to. I wish I could be there more often but that's just not the way it's worked out. I wish there was a better way for me to show how proud and excited and happy I am about the whole situation. Sometimes a persons boredom is enough to be celebrated (she knows what that means and it's not a slam by any means)!! We like to call ourselves 'mature' while the most of our old friends laugh at us and call us boring. We both still have a long way to go but we're growing, and we're trying to grow through the word of God. Cheers to making the best of our lives from this day forward!!! Love you lady!!!!

6 - Drew and I are still just bf/gf which is just fine for now but it's still frustrating. I don't know if the distance is what's so frustrating or what. If anyone has any words of wisdom, please share.

7 - I got a library card! I haven't used it yet, but as soon as I get through the stack of books currently on my book shelf, I'll be sure to use it.

8 - I've been walking a lot after work. Not so much this week because Monday and Tuesday it looked like rain and then today it's just kind of chilly - but the perfect kind of chilly for sitting on the back porch in a hoodie, curled up in a blanket with a good book. Walking is great though. I was able to put on a pair of pants last week that I hadn't worn since September. I thought that deserved a brownie - ha!

9 - I don't like to end on an even number so why not make a list of things I especially enjoy at this point in time: steamed artichokes
sufjan stevens
the color of grass
IHOP
Bistro on Main
screwtape lettera
coffee/chats with Drew
everything with mushrooms
open windows
the socks my mom gave me from her emergency hospital visit in ohio
mac and cheese made with penne pasta
Lars and the Real Girl (please watch this movie to learn about grace)
reading books/articles about lasting love
trying to be disciplined
my new system for not locking my keys in the car anymore
friday chats with grandma and grandpa
random dovey text messages from drew
my christmas lights are still up
tortillas with butter, cinnamon and sugar
my new candle
browsing wal mart but rarely buying anything
simple living
dancing with Drew like no bodies watching and then finding out that actually, quite a few people had been watching for quite a while
the anticipation of summer nights
the quietness of my apartment
feeling like a grown up
church in yoder, IN
my mom and dad and the example they've set for isaac and i
myspace surveys
the orange i got for 50 cents the other day
recycling
Viva paper towels
the thought of my hands not smelly like dish water when i go to bed
sitting in Drew's dad's kitchen listening Andy tell stories about Drew growing up
looking back on the last 9 months and just feeling happiness
the conversations i get to have every day
learning about grace
readings about selflessness and trying hard to live it, recognizing my failure, learning to apologize, and trying again

my tummy is telling me to get up and eat something......

much love
carrie jade

High School

2008-04-10T17:35:00.000-04:00

I watched this exact video so often in journalism class that it's a miracle anything ever got done.

enjoy.

"Life-Style Choices"

2008-04-03T10:14:00.002-04:00

You've all probably heard about the recent violence in the fort. Why are the police afraid to call it what it is? "Life-style choices"? Really?

Get real about things. Ya know...

much love.
pray for peace.

boring.

2008-03-31T21:22:00.006-04:00

Apparently certain individuals feel my blog is too boring. This isn't going to help my cause because they've already seen these pictures but I'm adding them anyway. :)

A couple more.

Oh, and Carly, how do you feel about this dress?

And not to freak anyone out, but I keep meaning to show this to my mom. What do you think ma?

much love.
carrie jade

4000

2008-03-26T21:29:00.003-04:00

An interesting story from a soldiers perspective: 4000 Americans dead from TIME magazine.

4000 is even that many compared to the 700,000 we killed. But a tragedy nonetheless.

much love.

N.T. Wright

2008-03-24T16:32:00.002-04:00

Another good article that I felt the need to archive:

Easter's Challenge to Empire by N.T. Wright

A couple quotes:

As the gospels tell the story, Jesus' death was the culmination of several different strands: a political process, a religious clash, a spiritual war, all rushing together into one terrible day, one terrible death. And in the light of that, according to Jesus himself and his first followers, everything in the world looks different, is different, must be approached differently. With Jesus' death, the power structures of the world were called to account; with his resurrection, a new life, a new power, was unleashed upon the world. And the question is: How ought this to work out? What should we be doing as a result?

The creator God allows societies to rise and fall, empires to grow and wane. And though things are massively more complicated than this, we could see in the rise of America as the current sole superpower some great possibilities for bringing justice and mercy, genuine freedom and prosperity, to the whole world. Empires always carry that possibility. But empires also face the temptation to use their power for their own prestige and wealth. The challenge now is to provide a critique of American empire without implying that the world should collapse into anarchy, and a fresh sense of direction for that empire without colluding with massive abuses of power.

The Christian gospel, revealing the mysterious God we discover in Jesus and the Spirit, offers a framework for discerning where God is at work in the midst of the dangers and opportunities that confront us. All of us in our different callings are summoned to this task; some of you, perhaps, to make it your life's work. Jesus is Lord. The Spirit is powerful. God is doing a new thing. Let's get out there and join in.

much love.

Inspiriation

2008-03-19T15:16:00.003-04:00

Here is a link to my friend Tara's, Uncle Jeremy's blog.

The subtitle to the blog is:

Jeremy Winkelman, a 29-year-old young man with cerebral palsy will ride from San Diego, California to St. Augustine Florida. Jeremy's goal is to show other special needs young people that even with handicaps you can accomplish difficult physical challenges.

Also, you can donate money to the trip here.

I ain't gonna let em catch me, no

2008-03-17T21:36:00.002-04:00

Every once in a while I have to make a list of things that make me smile:

my family::
my friends::
music::
good books::
laying on the couch watching movies::
drinking coffee all day long::
dancing like crazy with my boyfriend::
dressing up::
church::
sweat pants::
making cookies::
staying up all night laughing::
nights i'll never remember::
nights i'll never forget::
meeting random people::
helping change lives::
my girls in nashville, l.a., and indiana::
kisses::
my dog::
going out to dinner::
taking pictures::
randomness with carly::
dallas cowboys and all things texas::
mornings::
the color red::
mondays::
sunshine::
wal mart::
love::
learning::
learning to love::
drew and dreaming up our future::
haircuts with kara::
miller lite::
my lamp::
potatoes w/onions, cheese, sour cream and hot sauce::
reading theology and ethics::
a good, comfy chair::
dove dark chocolate::
plants::
depressing movies::
daisies::
the allman brothers band::
music with no words::
coasters::
handmade pottery::
recycling::
the simplicity of living on a very limited budget::
serving::
the community i work in::
george house coffee shop::
the guilty pleasure of a really good snickerdoodle::
my teddy bear::
cinnamon oatmeal::
a glass of 2% milk before bed::
walks::
5 hour conversations about everything and nothing with the love of my life::
really worn in shoes::
driving alone at sunrise::
coffee cups::
collecting change::
homemade cards::
prayer::
a child's happiness::
old navy socks::
reading blogs::
playing catch::
big bodies of water::
green grass::
kind strangers::
spiderman macaroni and cheese::
my quilt::
retro-looking household things like my grandmothers blue and white bowls::
recipe websites::
fluffy pillows::
nivea lotion::
really good toilet paper::
white christmas lights::
america's funniest videos::
the word 'peace' and how it looks and thinking about what it means::
the real Jesus we read in the Bible, not the one i remember learning::
my radical parents::
the words 'revolutionary', 'personification', 'eschatology' and 'characteristics'

*these appeared in no particular order. now about that glass of milk before bed...

much love.
carrie jade

And then he said...

2008-03-04T15:16:00.001-05:00

I've had the same quotes on my facebook profile for a long time and I wanted to delete them but still save them somewhere. So here they are:

"peace by way of war is like purity by way of fornication
it’s like telling someone murder is wrong
and then showing them by way of execution" Derek Webb, "My Enemies are Men like Me"

"There are two ways to end war: kill everyone, or kill no one." My Dad

"Life is not about learning how to die." Mi Padre

"The only thing harder than hatred is love. The only thing harder than war is peace. The only thing that takes more work, tears, an sweat than division is reconciliation. But what more beautiful things could we devote our lives to? Until the courage that we have for peace surpasses the courage that we have for war, violence will continue to triumph, and imperial execution rather than divine resurrection will have the final word." Shane Claiborne, Irresistable Revolution, p. 285.

"May you have much happiness and productive outrage..." my mom.

"Perhaps failure is only fatal if we chose to let it define us.," another Dad quote.

"In essence, we have failed to grasp Jesus' message, which is liberation of the poor through the dismantling of violent social structures which have been set up BY the powerful FOR the power and at the expense of the oppressed." -postmodernbeat.blogspot.com

"We are told to let our light shine, and if it does, we won't need to tell anybody it does. Lighthouses don't fire cannons to call attention to their shining- they just shine."
Dwight L. Moody

"Life is a game and true love is a trophy." Rufas Wainwright

"What you feel only matter to you. It's what you do to others that matters to them." - The Last Kiss

Good lookin bunch

2008-03-03T19:25:00.002-05:00

I like this photo. Good people.

I'm hoping to make it to Muncie to see there farewell (hopefully temporary) tour.

This is Good.

2008-02-29T16:20:00.000-05:00

"I Love My Name"

Justice/Salvation

2008-02-29T15:17:00.003-05:00

I finally finished all of the books I was almost done with and have started on two new ones.

In the first book I started (I'm still in the preface), the author states that liberation is another word for salvation.

I haven't processed this yet but decided to post this thought for further reflection at a later time.

Merriam-Webster defines salvation:
1 a: deliverance from the power and effects of sin b: the agent or means that effects salvation cChristian Science : the realization of the supremacy of infinite Mind over all bringing with it the destruction of the illusion of sin, sickness, and death
2: liberation from ignorance or illusion
3 a: preservation from destruction or failure b: deliverance from danger or difficulty

and liberation:
1 : the act of liberating : the state of being liberated
2 : a movement seeking equal rights and status for a group (women's liberation)

peace.
carrie jade

When it rains it pours

2008-02-27T15:46:00.002-05:00

Okay, so here's #3 for the day and hopefully this is it.

A good friend of mine who I hold very close to my heart is writing a paper about her identity. She had me read over the beginning and once again for personal reasons I feel the need to save it:

My life is best defined as a parody. Hours in self reflection, flipping through the pages of old journals, and reviewing the defining moments of my life have made me realize that my life has been a series of dichotomies containing one consistency; I know that I do not know.

I have spent significant amounts of time exploring the great mysteries of life, religion, and self, and I have felt my beliefs to be ultimate truths. My decisions and behaviors have been guided by my strong beliefs. It has been these beliefs, so I have thought, that would shape the rest of my life. What would remain certain, however; is that I am perpetually uncertain.

I have ridden a pendulum that swings from christianity to atheism, from optimism to pessimism, from indominable strength, to paralyzing weakness. I have spent much time believing that life was best spent at on end of the spectrum or the other, and it was the time I spent in life’s dark places, that lead to my most profound revelation.

Life is not circumstantial, it is unpredictable and ever-changing. The only thing I have control over is how I feel in those moments. I have one belief, and one belief only: the love I have for myself, and the love I give to others is the foundation of what I will give to life, and what I will take away from it as well. It is this belief that is the essence of my being.

In case you decide to comment, I asked this friend if she still felt that "life was best spent at on end of the spectrum or the other". She said no, so that was good news to me.

Anyway, just wanted to add this to my archives.

much love.
carrie jade

Quote

2008-02-27T13:40:00.002-05:00

I just finished The Real Mary by Scot McKnight.
I would reccomend reading it and have conveniently attached a link so you can buy it.

For personal reasons I'm recording this quote from page 148:

Conversion is a life-long process of being transformed. Some of us think the apostle Paul's dramatic conversion experience on the Damascus Road is the norm, but it is far more likely that the story of the real Mary is the norm. Mary's faith developed: She was smitten with the dynastic notion that God was about to make her son the king of Israel. But she soon learned, as she watched and learned to follow her own son as the Messiah, that such an idea of an earthly Davidic dynasty set up in Jerusalem gave way to the formation of something else, namely a faith family, that would branch out into the whole world. She wrestled with her son, even opposing the work he did. It is true, as the evangelical scholar Tim Perry says, that Mary's life "is one that mirrors the lives of many believers, with moments of intense spirituality interrupted by extended periods of ambiguity."

This book really shed new light into the life of Mary in the Bible and helped explain the whole Catholic idea of her role. It's an easy and beneficial read. If you've never thought of Mary outside of the Nativity scene you should especially give this book a gander.

peace and much love,
carrie jade

Hello

2008-02-27T11:57:00.000-05:00

Question: Do you get strange emails in regards to your blog? I don't know why mine generates as much traffic as it does, it really doesn't have much content on it other than personal ramblings, but lately I keep getting emails from people.

Weird.

Anyway, how are you doing?

Today is my mom's Birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!

I don't have much to say but Drew really wanted me to put a picture up of the Count from Sesame Street. I don't remember why but that's okay. I said I'd do it. He doesn't even know that apparently I was obsessed with Sesame Street as a little tyke.

Anyone else think the snow yesterday was BEAUTIFUL but a complete inconvenience? It made me think of the last funeral I was at. They said that when everyone complains about the snow Kane would say something like, "it has to snow before spring cane get here".

A lot of things are like that in life I suppose. Most good things don't just show up without a little bit of an inconvenience before hand. For example, you don't get to crawl into bed at night without and entire day of work, homework, and cleaning stuff up. That was a lame example but definitely what I was just thinking about.

I'm treating myself to potato soup for supper tonight. I bet you're jealous.

Make today special!
much love,
carrie jade

So funny

2008-02-22T11:30:00.001-05:00

I'm sorry if this offends you. Hopefully you know how I feel about children and can appreciate why I think this is hilarious. The description about the woman at the microwave has nothing to do with this commercial. I'm not sure why it's there. Enjoy.

Little Update

2008-02-12T21:11:00.000-05:00

Well folks, here's an update on my educational status:

After much thought and prayer, along with several affirmations from some important people that an MBA doesn't quite fit for me I have scheduled a meeting with the Dean of the School of Liberal Arts at UF. I don't meet with him until Tuesday but I'm really really really hoping all goes well.

I will be required to take : Seminar in Humanities, Seminar in Fine Arts, Seminar in Social Science and a 500, 600 and 700 level series of classes in which the outcome will be a thesis paper/presentation.
I will also have to choose 5 electives and at this point would love to take Issues in Music, Issues in Religious Studies, Issues in Gender Studies, Issues in Sociology and Issues in Leadership.

I know, I know, what the heck will I do with this degree? Maybe nothing specific. If there's one thing I learned after my time at Huntington, any education, any degree, can be applied to some part of almost any workplace.

I decided to pursue an MBA because it seemed like the right move professionally. But think about my personality for one second...am I the person who works for the money so I can buy crap? I mean, granted, I used to have a shopping problem but I KNOW that fulfillment in life does not come from making money.

I think a Master's level degree will benefit me regardless of what the subject is. Discipline is discipline and I am not disciplined to learn Accounting. I'd rather write a 50 page paper on the ethics of accounting than have to do a financial report.

I don't know why I'm trying to defend myself. Probably because this is something that I've been thinking about since about the hour before my Management class started and I haven't really told anyone.

No decisions have been made other than that I will not graduate with an MBA - not because I'm dropping out but because I won't be able to get As in advanced accounting. Okay, i would be able, but i don't care enough.

So there's one update.

I just found out that one of the girl's I chaperoned at the campus life trip to florida a year or two ago was in a car accident. Apparently she won't wake up and they're afraid her brain is bleeding. Keep Norwell High School in your prayers. It's not looking good. When it rains is pours....

much love.
carrie jade

tragic.

2008-02-06T13:40:00.000-05:00

Kane Krinn.

This was fun.

2008-01-30T09:53:00.000-05:00

*On a side note: i've had a serious of unfortunate events in my life the last 2-3 weeks. nothing super serious but just a lot of little things adding up to try and bring me down.

Well, this morning I got up early and was really productive. Everything went smoothly. Then I got to work to tell Shari that I actually had a good morning and half way through the sentence a button fell off my coat. Then I got the giggles, and it felt really good.

much love.
carrie jade

FMOI

2008-01-29T16:34:00.000-05:00

FMOI: for my own information.

This is too good.

Interestin

2008-01-28T14:50:00.000-05:00

Sojourners posted an interesting story about Mr. Obama today (please note that after my Mick/Mitt incident I did not attempt Obama's first name even thought I just looked it up). You can read it here.

I still haven't made a clear decision on who I will vote for. He is definitely the candidate that I dislike the least. None of them really stand out to me yet. I guess you could say he's winning by default.

Hillary is starting to freak me out - I know that much.

Anyway....

much love.
carrie jade

Shoutout to Drew and a Question

2008-01-24T11:06:00.000-05:00

Drew is the coolest person ever (and he didn't tell me to write something nice about him or use him as an inspiration for this post).

Here is an updated photo of me at work:

I finally singed up for classes next term at UF. I'm taking management of Human Resources and Management of Info and Technology (QUESTION: Anyone know what that second one is?).

Okay, that's all for now. Maybe someday I will write something meaningful.

much love.
carrie jade

For Everyone

2008-01-19T12:36:00.000-05:00

One of the professor's where I work recently started a website for personal growth. (Here's the link).

I've only looked around for about 10 minutes but I'm really excited to see what it has to offer. Gwen asks very challenging questions some times but she's an extremely brilliant woman.

Please take a gander!

Carrie Jade

Drew's PersonalDNA

2008-01-19T12:28:00.000-05:00

PersonalDNA: Your True Self Revealed

2008-01-18T10:01:00.001-05:00

I found this link on facebook. It takes a little while to go through but it's sometimes nice to know a little more about yourself. In BOLD and italics are my comments:

You are a Leader

Your solid grounding in the practicalities of life, along with your self-assuredness and your willingness to appreciate new things make you a LEADER.

You're in touch with what is going on around you and adept at remaining down-to-earth and logical.

Although you're detail-oriented, this doesn't mean that you lose the big picture. I think this is one of my stronger qualities.

You tend to find beauty in form and efficiency, as opposed to finding it in broad-based, abstract concepts. I do love structure and routine and believe they bring efficiency to everything.

Never one to pass on an adventure, you're consistently seeking and finding new things, even in your immediate surroundings. I think my idea of adventure is very different from most people my age. For example: safari in Africa sounds exhausting, walking around Philly by myself sounds adventurous.

Because of this eagerness to pursue new experiences, you've learned a lot; your attention to detail means that you gain a great deal from your adventures. Please note that I do enjoy new things even though I prefer the familiar. But, all familiar things were new at one point. Maybe I enjoy making new things familiar...

The intellectual curiosity that drives you leads you to seek out causes of and reasons behind things. The heart of a communications major.

Your confidence gives you the potential to take your general awareness and channel it into leadership.

You're not set on one way of doing things, and you often have the skills and persistence to find innovative ways of facing challenges. Ha ha. Kind of. I do enjoy the challenge of being innovative when something clearly isn't working. But why fix something if it isn't broken?

You are well-attuned to your talents, and can deal with most problems that you face.

You are balanced in your approach to problem-solving, not letting your emotions hold you up. I think this is true only if I take a minute to step away from my emotions, especially anger. I can tend to react emotionally.

You prefer to have time to plan for things, feeling better with a schedule than with keeping plans up in the air until the last minute.

If you want to be different:

There's more to life than the practical - take some time to daydream and explore the aesthetic sides of things. *Nonsense! :)

how you relate to others
You are Advocating

Being social, empathic, and understanding makes you ADVOCATING.

Some people find being around others exhausting—but not you! You are energized by spending time with friends, and you are good at meeting new people. As long as I can have a day or two to my self.

One of the reasons you enjoy conversation as much as you do is that you often learn about yourself while talking things out with a friend; you realize things about your own beliefs while discussing them with others. Agreed times a million!

You have insight into what others are thinking and feeling. This ability allows you to be happy for others, and to commiserate when something has gone wrong for them. I'm not so confident about this.

You are highly compassionate, and being conscious of how things affect those close to you leaves you cautious about trusting others too hastily.

Despite these reservations, you are open-minded when it comes to your worldview; you don't look to impose your ways on others. Too open-minded?

Your sensitivity towards others' plights contributes to an understanding—both intellectual and emotional—of many different perspectives. I don't know...

As someone who understands the complexities of the world around you, you are reluctant to pass judgments. For the most part

If you want to be different:

While it's important to think about others, don't forget to take some time for yourself, and occassionally to put yourself first. I live by myself dude. I have lots of Carrie time.

Take some time to spend with a few close friends; although it's difficult to find people to trust, it's worth the effort. I trust 5 people off the top of my head. I should really work on this.

When you have great ideas, it can be hard to relinquish control, but it can also feel good to take the pressure off and enjoy someone else leading the way. Another really valuable idea from this little survey

Go learn about yourself!

Update

2008-01-17T09:44:00.000-05:00

Well - probably about time I do the old New Year update and since I'm a fan of lists you get a list. :)

1. I started grad school. I'm in the MBA program taking one class in the classroom and one on-line. So far I have learned that accounting can make sense if you don't try so hard and on-line classes are stupid so I won't take anymore of them (my marketing, management and econ class is on-line). I don't think I'm cut out for a business degree ( I can do it, yes, but I don't like it and therefore don't know if I should do it) so we'll see how long it lasts. Maybe if UF gave me and advisor I would have someone to talk to about my goals. I'm not impressed with them but was probably spoiled by HU.
2. I still have a boyfriend and we're not married. We still talk about it a lot but there's still a lot to do. I am only impulsive when it comes to shopping. There are just a lot of steps in getting to a place where marraige will work and be enjoyable - like not having serious amounts of college debt.
3. I still work at Winebrenner and still love my job. Last night I explained to a lady why I couldn't buy the pair of jeans she wanted me to even though I looked like I had the money (she really said that). I told her that I took a job that I knew I would enjoy, provided a great work environment and would give me more opportunities than I could ever ask for. And even though one day I want a job fighting for a cause, in my own way I am helping others in their ministry and therefore I consider my job to be a ministry as well. It would be hard to grow up to be a great theologian if you never had a student mailbox in seminary. :)
4. I still read a lot. I'm currently reading another Anne Lamont book that Isaac's girlfriend let me borrow. Expect quotes to be posted soon since I can't write in the book, dog ear the pages and put in on my shelf to refer back to. Anne Lamont - she's a character, and she's real, and I can look up to her because she loves God, has devoted her life to God but still says 'shit'. (That's not the only reason I like her).
5. My working out life is temporarily on hault due to the fact that I dont' have time. It sucks. I'm really craving the gym.
6. I still eat oatmeal almost every day. Sometimes I eat Honey Bunches of Oats instead.
7. I'm getting glasses this weekend. That's all I'm saying about that.
8. I started this new thing where I have to drink 32 oz. of water before I'm allowed to have a glass of milk each day. I need more water and it's an easy way to start. However, since I began this little discipline I've consistently woken up at 4 a.m. and had to pee. That's annoying.
9. I'm still trying to be thankful every day for the people who bless my life. I'm trying to not hang out people who bring me down and I'm getting a good idea of who those people are (especially last weekend). Some people are so stinkin mean and I don't want to feel like I have something to prove to anyone (I think that brings out the worst in me).
10. My bestest friend moved back to Ft. Wayne due to unfortunate circumstances but I couldn't be happier about being reunited and I'm very optimistic and hopeful for what's ahead for the both of us. We've only had the opportunity to hang out once but i felt so much better.
11. I hate ending on an even number so I'll get back to this one.

Okay. That's that for now because I have a meeting to attend. I didn't edit this but I"ll be back so don't hold it against me. I need to develop a list of my 2008 to-dos.

New Song

2008-01-15T14:26:00.000-05:00

"Falling or Flying"

I had my iPod on random while I was studying over my lunch break and came across this song. It's by Grace Potter and the Nocturnals.

It's really pretty and that's how I feel.

Falling or flying? Either way...it all seems to be up in the air.

Yay!

2008-01-10T09:22:00.000-05:00

I hope this isn't too selfish, but please look at Scot McKnight's blog. You'll notice a post about Conversion at Winebrenner.

(my name is in there). :)

YAY FREE ADVERTISING!

And, for those of you who know how stressed out I was about the event, it went as well as it could have. Scot was wonderful, the message was well-received, people were challenged, we all learned, and God was definitely present for the worship.

I can't wait until my next opportunity to hear Prof. McKnight speak.

Rob Bell

2008-01-04T10:55:00.000-05:00

An interesting answer from Rob Bell when asked by Relevant magazine, "What do you think the response should be toward international conflicts? What can we do to reach out to communities that have been labeled as evil?"

He says:
"First and foremost, in Ephesians 2, Jesus is all about new humanity. What happens when Christ is being incarnated, taking on flesh and blood, is always new humanity, so any person I encounter - regardless of their religious background, their skin color, their worldview, their political stance - they are a fellow human being created in the image of God. I have a bond with them that transcends every other bond. Humans are created in the image of God. Only later do you have geography, family boundaries, ethnic groups and religion. What happened is that we have flipped that upside down, and people begin with all of their differences; they begin with all the ways in which we aren't alike.

There is an absolutely mind-blowing passage in Isaiah 19 where God calls Egypt His son and Assyria His beloved. Egypt and Assyria were the arch-enemies of Israel. Today, that passage would literally be "Taliban My son, Al-Queda My beloved." There's also this amazing metaphor where Joshua's going into battle, and he meets an angel of the Lord. Joshua asks whose side the angel is on, and the angel says, "Neither." To me that is one of the most helpful passages, because everybody is interested in whose side God is on-and the response in Joshua is "neither." I love that."

For those of you who don't know, Rob Bell started and currently pastor's Mars Hill church - with a congregation of more than 10,000. He is also the author of "Velvet Elvis" and "Sex God", both of which are excellent books that anyone could read. Bell received his BA from Wheaton College and an M.Div. from Fuller Theological Seminary. If you've ever seen a Nooma video, that's him too and although I have some difficulty watching them most people think they're great, so go buy one.

Anyway, his opinions are educated, well thought out, and helpful.

Peace.

Carrie Jade

P.S. Thanks for the subscription to Relevant...I'm guessing Mom and Dad. :)

nothing comes to mind

2007-12-21T09:45:00.000-05:00

I don't feel well - physically and otherwise.

I had a bad night. No sleep and conversations that weren't pleasant. I don't want to write something I will regret so I'm leaving that go. But I have this weird feeling of not being able to take a complete breath. It's like there's a pain in my chest but it doesn't really hurt. I can't say that I'm upset that I'm at work alone this morning. And although I was just able to have a phone conversation I'm really dreading the first, "how are you?" of the day.

I will say this so that no one worries and that you may offer advise before I load on my opinions: how do you deal with your significant other having someone of the opposite sex for a best friend when your experience has proved, several times over, that a man and a woman can not purely be "just friends"? There is no issue of trust. I trust. But I know, that deep down, there is an emotional connection that I don't want to share with some other girl.

Nothing dramatic has taken place. I'm just unable to articulate how I feel - even though I tried. I tried and I sounded like a stupid, insecure, jealous idiot.

I deal with things all wrong. Now all I want to do is be by myself - no phone, no people. Just some Band of Horses and some sudoku.

This is not me asking for comfort or pity or words of encouragement. This is me, the over opinionated girl who can't talk about feelings, attempting to release some tension.

It's not working.

I think I only really had one best friend in High School. It was a he. But he was head over heals in love with me since the day we met. Part of me always thought that in the end, it would be the two of us. He thought that, I thought that, his family thought that. An unfortunate series of events has led us to a relationship of nothing but phone tag. Not that it's a bad thing. I don't think it would be good for Drew and I if this friend and I were still best friends. I don't believe that anything would ever happen between this friend and I - but there would just be this connection that I have decided belongs to someone else.

And never mind the 2 year relationship that ended. It didn't end because of the 'just friend' that I had bad feelings about. However, 2 months later, the 'just friend' and him found out they would bring a little girl into the world.

I'm not saying you can't have friends of the opposite sex. I do, I have a lot. I just think it's dangerous to have a best friend like that. And maybe it's not.

I understand that sometimes our feelings are irrational. Sometimes we really truly and deeply feel something that is nothing more than and insecurity (beyond this friend being extremely nice, talented, friendly and fun to be around, she's beautiful...the skinny, long legged, natural pretty with a killer sense of fashion that I will never be). And she sings, and he sings, and I suck at singing. And she travels around the world. And her family loves him and he plays scrabble with her dad. "he's the smartest man he knows".

I said I wasn't going to get into this.

Never underestimate the power of distractions. I just met with two guys concerning our copier/printer needs up here. One of the guys had a best friend who played basketball at Huntington College. I think everyone is some how connected to that place. Two profs here met while they were both teaching at HU. One prof here has a good friend who used to teach there. There are students here who did their undergrad there. It's crazy.

I feel a little better. Things generally get better. I'm not really worried about things staying crappy...just worried about my inability to deal with crappy stuff. I avoid things until they hit me in the face. Then I don't know what to do.

Oatmeal chocolate chip cookies and a good Coffee D'Vine vanilla latte in a mug with whippie. I think that would solve my problems right now. Well, I would feel better.

Watching Pride and Prejudice with Danielle sounds good too. As long as she brings the queso.

Or margaritas with Tara. We could talk about movies, books and music. And boys and life. I'm very thankful for our understanding of each other...even though we must look odd sitting at a table. Me in my jeans and hoodie and her in her dress and heals. Being different can be so beautiful.

Best Buy with Isaac would do some justice. Like in the old days when I had more money and no bills to pay.

Or the Food Network at home in the big chair with my quilt and Bogey at my feet.

Panera and Ulta with Mom.

EOC with mom and dad.

Grandma's kitchen table. Shouldn't have said that one...

Grandpa's pork chops with him and Grandma.

Coffee and church with Tim, Elizabeth, Joey and Laura.

Christmas time.

Spidey Mac and Cheese with Drew. On the red couch watching Always Sunny. Talking about 'someday'.

Being able to wear tennis shoes and jeans to work on Friday.

Talks with Jeannine who will be here soon.

Thinking about seeing Robyn soon even though it turns out Drew can't meet her after all.

Cinnamon Oatmeal.

Band of Horses (since everyone has been doing lists of the top albums of 2007, they win mine. I know you probably thought I would say Arcade Fire or Kings of Leon but nope, Band of Horses takes the cake for me.)

Harry Potter books and the sadness and joy that came with finishing the series.

Growing up and all the independence.

Live Neil Young cds.

Burt's Bees chap stick.

George House gift card from a student who wanted to thank me for typing and sending his reference letters for a professor who just doesn't get typing and email.

An elderly neighbor who let me borrow the coolest scraper I've ever seen to clean my windows after the snow storm. It had a telescope handle so that I could clean the entire windshield from one side of my car...this side that didn't have a drift.

Homemade Apple Butter on my toast this morning. Thanks Shari.

And still Smartwater. It's just so tasty.

I have much to be thankful about. And many in my life to be thankful for.

much love.
carrie jade

Congrats!

2007-12-18T12:27:00.000-05:00

My little brother got a movie review he wrote published.

The website it was published on is a really good place to go for music reviews and whatnot. Go look.

much love.

The L Word

2007-12-11T17:25:00.000-05:00

No, not lesbian. Sorry for those of you who are fans of the show.

But the word love and all it means.

I believe that we were created to love - it's what life is all about. I think it means many different things to many different people. If love was easy, a always the same, it wouldn't be so exciting.

But true love.

I had a conversation with an adjunct here at Winebrenner who was asking about the seriousness of my relationship with my boyfriend. I told her I sometimes feel silly because we haven't been together for very long but we talk about the rest of our lives together very confidently. We were friends for a few years before dating but for some reason, since the second we decided it was more than a friendship, we've just felt like this was it. We didn't tell each other about our feelings for some time but when the conversation was obviously leading that way we both blurted out the same thing at the same time.

It seems silly. But then my dear friend told me about her and her husband's relationship. They were good friends for about 2 and half years before they dated. 7 days (not months, not years, days) after they started dating they decided they would get married. They had 3 couples pray that this was the right decision and a month later they were engaged.

Now, I by no means plan on doing this. They were older and both done with school. Drew has at least a year and half before he's done with school so it will be at least a year and a half before we would make this kind of decision. It was just fun to hear. And made me feel less silly.

I was just thinking about how messed up love can be sometimes - or how we can mess it up.

Another friend story. I have a friend who has been on and off with a girl for some time. She recently moved on and got another boyfriend. This friend of mine has kind of dragged this girl on for a while (as far as I understand). She had enough and moved on. But now he's ready to commit to her. He really wants to get serious. He even gave me permission to call him out if he cheat on her again. But he really says he loves her.

Seems messed up. Especially cause she's been around a lot. Her new bf is in Iraq so he doesn't know about any of it. It's frustrating (i know I've been frustrating too). Love can be abusive like that.

We were made to love and we don't do a very good job of taking it seriously or keeping it sacred. We toss it around. Our American culture has even made a man's love for a woman a symbol of weakness. It's quite sad. A man who wishes to save the act of love for the woman he marries must be gay. It's twisted.

Sometimes cravings do crazy things to a person. I ate a Whopper Jr. with cheese yesterday. The instant gratification lasted for about all of an instant. Definitely wasn't worth it.

I'm going know where with this. I was just thinking about it. And I'm bored...

I get to wear sparkles tonight! That makes me happy. I'm helping the Dr. Draper's with their Christmas party.

much love.
carrie jade.

p.s. i spell checked - didn't proof read. gotta run...

Save this.

2007-12-07T14:47:00.000-05:00

For my own future reference:

Mick Romney's religious speech.

anyone else have any issues picking a favorite?
he's not my favorite because a lot of what he said contradicts my view of Christianity, but he makes some good points. I'd say I disagree with him more than I agree.

carry on...

Fascinating

2007-12-07T09:04:00.001-05:00

On Thursday nights I generally go to bed after Grey's Anatomy (which these days, I watch mostly with my eyes under the blanket). Last night, however, Barbara Walters did a special in which she interviewed 2007s 10 Most Fascinating people.

Now, her list was weak:
1- Justin Timberlake*
2- Bill Clinton*
3,4- Tom and Chris who created Myspace*
5- Katherine Heigl (Izzy from Grey's Anatomy, and the girl in Knocked Up)
6- Don Imus the shock jock radio host who was fired for racist comments
7,8- David and Victoria Beckham (soccer super star and Posh Spice)
9- Jennifer Hudson, the American Idol loser but Academy Award winner
10- J.K. Rowling (author of Harry Potter)*

*Are in the right order, can't remember, can't find a list. not bad for memory though blah...

Some thoughts on this list:
1- Bill Clinton did the best job. Despite what people say about him, I like him. He messed up, yes, but he loves his wife very much and I'd say that in this election she will benefit because of her link to him.

Barbara asked him what he learned from his Quadruple Bypass surgery. He said that he has lived a life more extraordinary than most people who have ever lived. He realized that his life was spared for a reason and so from now on, he will try and help as many people as possible live an extraordinary life as well. He was very selfless and that surprised me.

Now, he wasn't totally selfless. He did say that he thought he was very well suited to be president and he really enjoyed his time in office. I don't' think he was being conceited though - he just knew that he was good and what he did.

2- Don Imus isn't a bad man. He said something on air that he meant to be funny and it wasn't. I think that every day, people on the radio, TV, Internet, whatever say much much worse things than him and get away with it. He said the difference between everything else he says, and what he said about the girls on the basketball team was that the girl's didn't deserve his ridicule (he went on to say that Dick Cheney is a war criminal and Hillary Clinton is the devil).

Barbara spent a lot of time talking about the Ranch that him and his wife built for chronically ill children. That wasn't the only contribution that Mr. Imus makes to this world. I was glad to see Barbara focus on the good side of him. Too bad a majority of the world will always think of him as a racist idiot.

He also made and interesting comment when she asked him what it was like to apologize to the girls. He said that since he had already lost his job, he was able to sincerely apologize. If he hadn't already lost his job the apology would have seemed insincere as if he was just trying to keep his job.

A lot of our apologies are self-serving and he indirectly pointed that out.

3-Perhaps my favorite interview was Jennifer Hudson. I had no clue who she was until this interview. She recognized that everything she had was from God. It seemed genuinely sincere - the opposite of when someone like Jay-Z says it. The special highlighted bits of her life and it was obvious that this girl was raised in the church. She said that God had given her the opportunity to shine, this is her time to shine and she's going to shine as much as she can.

Well, those were the three things I thought about before I went to bed last night. I think the list sucked actually. I wouldn't have picked any of those people as 2007s most fascinating individuals. I think it's quite sad actually...David and Victoria Beckham, really? I think Britney Spears is 10 times more fascinating than them if that's what kind of list we're looking at.

J.K. Rowling had an interesting story. Her and Mr. Clinton have probably influenced the world anyway. Tom and Chris probably have as well I suppose.

I was disappointed but ehh...that's showbiz.

Happy Holidays everyone!
much love.
carrie jade

Life Lessons with LaMont

2007-11-29T11:15:00.000-05:00

Dr. LaMont Monford is in the building today moving to a bigger office. If you've never heard about him, goggle his name...he has a tremendously incredible life story.

This morning, some children where he is the Superintendent were picking on his daughter. You know the old, "your dad is in charge so you get everything." Being a dad, he stopped in the students classroom and told them something along these lines:

First, he wrote the word 'LIFE' on the chalkboard. He asked them to spell it out. Then he crossed out the 'F'. He told them that most children, and most adult live life without the 'f'. Then he asked them what was on the board: LIE.

He told them how too many people live life trying to Impress and Depress those around them. These people are not okay with who they are by themselves.

So, the lesson I learned today is to live life, LIFE and to live LIFE in a way that positively reflects God and my mother and father.

**And for those who think that PK, be it Principal's or Pastor's or Teacher's children, whatever - have it better, they actually have it twice as hard. Think about it, if your Principal is your dad and you mess up at school, you get punished at school AND AGAIN when you get home. It all works itself out in the end...

I'll leave it at that.

much love.
carrie jade.

I was just reading

2007-11-28T11:17:00.000-05:00

Every now and again I come across an article that seems to be reading my mind. This morning I came across such an article on revelantmagazine.com. You can read it here.

I've been thinking about two things: 1. are the little things actually some what important, and 2. wtf, grace?

If you didn't read the article, I'll sum it up a bit. It starts with the author listening to Wilco in his car (actually, the exact song I listened to on the way to work). This partiuclar song has the "f-word" in it and he finds himself unable to sing it. He grew up in a similar background as myself - small rural, "christian" town (whatever that means). Acutally, he says that where he grew up, being a Christan meant you didn't "smoke, drink, swear, or get close to having premarital sex (holding hands is permissible)." Not so different from the rest of the world, I'm afraid.

I've been thinking about those first three things. How important are they? My previous self would say they don't really matter - in moderation. But my new self is beginning to wonder.

The author puts himself in an interesting imaginary situation:

I considered Jesus sitting in the passenger seat of my car, bobbing his head to the music along with me. Imagine my shock when he suddenly appeared there, acting as if nothing strange had just happened. Imagine when I finally managed to lift my jaw from the floor—me—the first person to speak with Jesus face to face in 2,000 years! Then I work up the courage to speak, and the first words out of my mouth are… “Is it ok for me to cuss in the car by myself when I’m singing along with the music?” How ridiculous would I sound? I actually played it out in my head. I ask the question. He replies by asking what a cuss word is or simply by saying, “Seriously?! That’s the first question I get?”

Ha ha. In the big picture, God probably doesn't give a flying f*** about whether or not i type out the word or edit with the ***'s. But grace plays a big part in all this.

The author describes grace in two ways: 1. ballerina grace and 2. the religious sense. As a lady, I feel I should strive for the ballerina grace. I agree with the author in that it is probably not acheivable without the religoius sense of the word.

It's not very lady-like to say bad words. I can still remember the first time I said a bad word - as a dare, 4th grade, on the bus, i said the 's' word that rhymes with pit. I was listening to Adam Zimmer's walkman - Amy Grant. I don't think I said another word like that for a few years. But then in High School I was labeled the good girl. Much to many parent's surprise, very few kids want to be labeled "the good one". So that was the bad habit i picked up. Smoking, drinking and sex were just way too much but swearing wasn't such a big deal. It's a habit that comes and goes for me. It's something that's died down recently. I have a boyfriend who says, "don't cuss, you're better than that." I agree, like the author, sometimes these words have a time and a place that seem right. But for the most part, they're stupid.

That's not exactly what I was thinking about though. I was thinking more a long the lines of little church stuff. Who lights the candles, titles, open conversations, rated R movies, dancing, tattoos, smoking, termanology, grape juice brand, who fries the fish. Little rules like this that some people cling to so much. The university I attended seemed to cling to these things so much.

Often times, I feel that people who cling to these things will cling to anything they feel they can have control over. They crave control. I think it's also and insecurtity thing.

But what if these things do matter - not literally, but in the big picture? For example, maybe it doesn't matter who fries the fish but how we deal with the people who it matters to. Maybe it doesn't matter that I say bad words sometimes but it does matter how I say them and who I say them in front of. Maybe titles don't matter, but how they affect people does matter. Maybe it doens't matter if they smoke in the parking lot but how we witness to them. Grace, right?

Little things are just little things, but grace is very big. Does it all boil down to grace? Or is it love, or faith? Maybe it's a combination.

I think you can love without grace or faith. I think you can have faith with out love or grace. But can you be graceful without love or faith or works? Perhaps we need to see a shift in priority. Maybe grace needs to be our number one. Maybe it is to you, but it hasn't been to me.

If grace becomes my number one, the way in which I percieve the little things will dramatically change.

I think I'm getting old, or at least growing up...

much love.
carrie jade

p.s. I have another thought but I'm not sure where it fits in above. Suppose smoking, tattoos and drinking don't matter to me one bit. Honestly, for the most part, they really don't. I think it's when my smoking (which I don't), drinking and tattoos (which i don't have), become a problem that they are a problem. Does that make sense? When they make me seem like a hypocrite, is when I fall short. If I claim that my body is a temple and then I polute my body, how does that look? Gosh! I just sunk my head in shame. I'm still not saying that we're bad Christians if we smoke, drink and have tattoos. I don't think that's it at all - in the big picture. I'm just not confident that they don't matter at all. They do matter, grace matters. Argh!!!

Thanksgiving

2007-11-27T16:41:00.000-05:00

I don't have much to write about acutally. But I wanted a more recent post than the last one I wrote. Before a make a list of things I'm thankful for I just want to take a moment to say that I took Drew to Illinois to meet my grandparents and I don't think it could have gone any better. Makes me happy.

On my drive home I was thinking of little thing I can be thankful for that most people in the world can't be thanksful for. So here are some things:

friends.family.boyfriend.text messaging.glaceau smartwater.maple brown sugar oatmeal.fodgers.microsoft office 2007.blogspot.blondie's oatmeal chocolatechip cookies.triple grande vanilla lattes.george house.wal mart.neon.produce section.spaghettio's.whole grain bread.whole wheat pasta.bertolli sauce.kitchen tables.bargain books.pilsbury holiday sugar cookies.eliptical machines.maury winsor.iPods.facebook.dry erase boards.ham&cheese.hand made quilts.pot roast.marketday.self adhesive envelopes.usps online.my teddy, oatmeal.photos.vidallia onions.music.bic pens.sweatpants.old navy socks.mashed potatoes in the microwave.3 hole punchers.coffee pots.shredded cheddar.work.hand written letters.love.orange gatorade.vending machines.netflix.phone dates.potted plants.generic food.coupon books that i never use.full moons.rain.dancing with my boyfriend for no reason.invitations.CGGC.harry potter.100 calorie packs.honey bunches of oats.cousins.happy babies.hand made cards.chick flicks.the color red.walks.grad school.puppies.dove dark chocolate.paper clips.go fish.tostitos party pizzas.the red cup.naps.saturday mornings.my dad's singing voice.kara, the girl who cuts my hair.black and white posters.spiderman mac and cheese.two person tables.my mom's laugh.writing with pencil.100% cranberry juice.my middle name.3 ring binders.hooded sweatshirts.down comforters.cutting boards.sudoku.2%milk.

okay, i could go on forever. i'll stop there.

much love.
carrie jade

Orange Gatorade

2007-11-16T16:36:00.000-05:00

I'm the only person at work- again. I have 24 minutes until I can leave. Really, if I left now no one would know except for me. And just because I CAN do something doesn't mean I should.

So here I sit, me and my orange gatorade.

and my clippies that, when turned upside down, resemble something Barbie might use for a purse. I have 4 different sizes.

orange gatorade and black clippies both remind me of when i was younger. strange.

I remember the first time I saw a whiteboard too. When my mom worked at the Metrocenter. I do whiteboard inventory (markers and erasers) at the seminary. Probably what I'm worst at because I never think of it.

I also had a dream about the inside of my grandpa's barn two nights ago. I honestly couldn't tell you the last time I went in there. I WILL take Drew inside next weekend. It's strange that the people I'm closest to now (minus family, graham, aaron and justin koch), no one has seen where I grew up. I'm really excited to map out the tour which will only take about 20 minutes and will encompass 3 towns (slight exageration).

This weekend I'm going to Bloomington for the IU/Purdue game - a game which I couldn't care less about. I was born in Illinois and that is where my Big 10 loyalty remains. In case you missed it, they beat THE Ohio State last weekend.

14 minutes.

Tailgaiting. Blah. I really have to be talked into it. Something about waking up real early to go spend time outside with a bunch of wasted people acting like animals over a football game doesn't appeal to me. What makes me laugh even more is how many girls I will see in short skirts and IU hoodies. These are the girls that would go camping in a skirt. duh.

On a brighter note, my summer time friends will be there. Tyce is back from Iraq in one piece. Bob and Sam will be representing Purdue. Drew is my boyfriend now. I'm guessing his roomies will be there. If only Todd weren't in Deleware and Ash didn't have to work. Anyone know if John is coming? And Courtney will be there.

Sometimes thinking about the past puts a smile on my face. 1. It was fun. and 2. it's in the past.

I'm happy with life right now. I signed up for a retirement plan today. They're giving me more than I thought. I am so blessed to have be offered this job. They give me so much. Well, my actual income is barely enough to survive (another exageration, barely) but I have so many benefits.

10 minutes.

I thought this would make time go a lot faster than it has.

Dr. Nissley's wife made chocolate chip cake. It has cinnamon or something in it. Very good. I'm taking some with me to share with Drew. No one else is here to eat it and it will jsut get thrown away.

Orange gatorade is so good. It reminds me of having the flu though. It's what my parent's gave us when we were sick. Come to find out that's actually a really bad idea. It's pretty sugary. Oh well, I will probably give it to my kids when they are sick.

Speaking of which, I asked my parents how it feels to know that they could be grandparents in the next 5 years. It was one of those things that about half way through saying it I didn't want to finish (Drew was int he car too). But, I figured it would be more awkward to aknowledge it than to just say it and change the subject.

Growing up is weird.

Okay, i'm lockin up shop, wrappin up cake and hittin the tanning bed.

hoooty hoooo!

much love.
carrie jade

Ah haha

2007-11-16T09:01:00.001-05:00

I always thought this guy was funny.

Ch Ch Ch Changes...

2007-11-15T10:10:00.001-05:00

I may be one of the 3 people in this world who LOVE change - big ones, not little ones - however, changes are exhausting.

I feel the need to explain the above statement. Every morning, I get up and make a pot of coffee. Then I take a shower, make my lunch, put on my make up, iron my pants, dry my hair, put my coffee in a cup, unplug everything, turn off all of my lights, double check hair straightener/iron, put my cell phone in my pocket and walk out the door. Some days I eat a bowl of Honey Bunches of Oats while I put on my makeup and some days I take a granola bar to work.

Then I come to work, turn on my computer, check my mail box, check my email, check my facebook, read my dad's blog, mom's, Joan's, Isaac's, j. andrew camps, emerging cggc, Scot McKnight's and sojourners. then i go to Shari's office. then i do my work. check the mail at noon. eat my ham and cheese sandwich and read a book from 1 to 2. then i work. i do sudoku at 4 to take my eyes off the computer. I leave at 6.

Monday's i just rest and watch Chuck and Heroes. Tuesdays I go to the Grocery. Wednesdays are no TV days and I read. Thursdays I clean and watch Ugly Betty and Greys. Fridays I generally go back to Indiana and if I don't I go to Bowling Green.

That's the way it is with some slight variations. Just the way it goes. I don't' like when these things change. But I do like to move to new places, work at new jobs, meet new people, travel to new places, learn new things, try new food. Sometimes those things get added into my routine.

Some things recently added:
1-I eat oatmeal for breakfast every day. I used to HATE oatmeal, now I don't.
2-No more sweet n low in my coffee. Sugar it is.
3-2 hard boiled eggs twice a week around 11:30.
4-Yogurt around 4 while I do sudoku (i used to HATE yogurt. it's taking longer than oatmeal but working okay. Much better for me than Cheetos from the vending machine and definitely cheaper).
5-Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday I bring an extra snack, such as a apple, to eat if I'm hungry around 5 because I go to the Cardio Center and run for 30 minutes (okay, right now it's kind of a walk, run, walk, run, walk...).
6-I get up 30 minutes earlier so that I can do the 20 minute Pilates video to start my morning. I have it memorized.
7-I eat at least one veggie for supper usually with whole wheat pasta. Generally Broccoli, Asparagus or Zucchini because they're really all I like. Sometimes I mix in onions and carrots. Veggies are pricey.

I think these are positive changes and they're all fairly easy. It's just exhausting to adjust. On top of that, my work load has seen a significant increase. Ending one term and starting another here at the school. Next semester I'll get to throw in Tuesday and Thursday classes. Lucky for me, I don't work until 9 so going to the gym at 7 for a 30 minute jog shouldn't be a big deal. Just another adjustment.

Plus, I'm trying to work on this Christmas gift I decided would be fun. I also learned how to knit (my yarn was weird though, it unraveled mid-scarf). Soon I will pick that up again.

Sometimes I feel like my life is a contradiction. I have things that have to be exactly how I want them. Ask Drew. The other day I got frustrated because he was stirring Stovetop with a spoon. It even says "fluff with FORK" on the box. I'm picky about little things. But for the most part, I just don't really care. Definitely a control issue I'm working on with his help. He's so patient.

I forgot I was supposed to go to a conference on Monday. I remembered in time to make it. It was about being an extraordinary assistant. It was good, I'll talk about it later perhaps.

I gotta do some work. Peace.

much love.
carrie jade

Sorry

2007-11-08T10:10:00.000-05:00

Okay, I'm obviously the only one up here right now so I've been reading too much online.

Anyway, I just got made angry by an article on cnn.com titled Study: Many of homeless are vets.

More than 25 percent of the homeless population in the United States are military veterans, although they represent only 11 percent of the civilian adult population, according to a report to be released Thursday.

Some veterans, like Jason Kelley find themselves in a catch-22, not able to find a job because of the lack of an apartment, and not being able to get an apartment because of not having a job, The Associated Press reported.

"The only training I have is infantry training and there's not really a need for that in the civilian world," AP quoted Kelley as saying in a phone interview. In addition, he has been diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder, he said, according to AP. Kelley served in Iraq with the Wisconsin National Guard.

At the National Alliance to End Homelessness event, Fannie Mae will announce a $200,000 grant to the Common Ground organization that will enable the construction of more permanent housing units for veterans.

$200,000? Really? My tuition (if I hadn't recieved grants/scholarships/loans) would have been $120,000 just for undergrad. I mean, every penny counts but really, $200,000 is all we can give?

"Our veterans have served America, and America must serve them," said Daniel Mudd, president and CEO of Fannie Mae, in a statement.

It true. I can keep my opinions of the war to myself for now. But these men have served our country, whether the reason is clear or not, and we put them on the streets when they get home.

Take your little yellow ribbon magnet off your car and really, truely support our troops when they come home.

I know I have more than a homeless man and I will most likely never know what it's like to return from war to nothing. But I have no money to give, and it probably wouldn't be safe for me to open my home to a man. But if you know of something I can do, please let me know. I can write a letter with the best of em just tell me where to send it.

Now I need a pick me up...does hampsterdance.com still exist?

much love.
carrie jade

One that matters

2007-11-08T10:04:00.000-05:00

Remember the words of Chuck Colson, next time someone corners you about Global Warming and you don't knwo what to say.

But for Christians, the question of global warming should not stop us from identifying a critical worldview issue here—one on which every Christian can, or should, agree: and that's the importance of good stewardship toward the rest of creation. There are things we can do now to be good stewards that do not require us to get all of the answers that are going to come on global warming...
... Working with institutions to reduce their energy usage ... is good stewardship. And it does not depend on what the scientists eventually can prove about global warming. It is all laid out for us already in the scriptures

the end.

What does that mean?

2007-11-08T09:30:00.002-05:00

I took the quiz Tammie had posted on her blog (I belong in 1956) but it said I was a romantic and I don't think I am. Then I took the following:

Your Celebrity Style Twin is Nicole Richie

The perfect blend of uptown and downtown.

Who's Your Celebrity Style Sister?

This is funny to me because this past summer my friend Ash and I had a strange obsessin with all things Nichole Ritchie. It wasn't that we wanted the freakishly skinny body, the drugs, or the pregnancy with the terrible "rock star", it was her style. He clothes, her hair, her "yeah I just did that because I wanted to" attitude. I'm okay with who I am, but her clothes!!!!!!

There, and half-hearted, fun lil post.

carry on...

What does that mean?

2007-11-08T09:30:00.001-05:00

What Sarah Said

2007-11-07T12:08:00.000-05:00

So there's this song that a couple of my friends have told me they listen to when they're remember the death of someone close to them.

It's good.

"What Sarah Said"

And it came to me then that every plan is a tiny prayer to father time
As I stared at my shoes in the ICU that reeked of piss and 409
And I rationed my breaths as I said to myself that I'd already taken too much today
As each descending peak on the LCD took you a little farther away from me
Away from me

Amongst the vending machines and year-old magazines in a place where we only say goodbye
It stung like a violent wind that our memories depend on a faulty camera in our minds
But I knew that you were a truth I would rather lose than to have never lain beside at all
And I looked around at all the eyes on the ground as the TV entertained itself

'Cause there's no comfort in the waiting room
Just nervous pacers bracing for bad news
And then the nurse comes round and everyone will lift their heads
But I'm thinking of what Sarah said that "Love is watching someone die"

So who's going to watch you die?..

Death Cab for Cutie would have provoked too many tears last year. But this song couldn't bring memories back to mind more perfectly than it does. Even the choice of name seems too real. Well, it's just ironic that Sarah was my grandmothers name. If only it mentioned that food...

much love.
carrie jade

Stealing

2007-11-06T12:02:00.000-05:00

I'm stealing this from my dad's blog.

But this is my dog, and those are his "you won't leave me here by myself, will you?" eyes.

I miss him.

Whew!

2007-11-05T17:54:00.000-05:00

I'm exhausted. I don't know why but I am.

Well, I think I do know why.

It is extremely exhausting to me to be surrounded by 14 other girls I went to college with. Small talk, acting interested, being girlie...exhausting.

Also, Saturday was a really rough day for me. And a rough night - especially night. I bottle things up and then they overwhelm me. To be overwhelmed is exhausting. I just kind of crashed.

Sunday got off to a bad start but went well and that made everything better. I was 10-ish minutes late to church but Drew came with me. Oh, and on our way there, his roommate Tom called and asked if he could come to. Then the whole lot of us went to Applebees with mom, dad and isaac to celebrate Dad's big Four Five. I took a beautiful nap, watched the colts fight hard, went to see Across the Universe with Drew (good, really good, strange, but good), and then watched the Cowboys DOMINATE the Eagles. The drive back was peaceful. Lots of Jars of Clay - then just silence.

But then today - who's decision was it to have faculty meetings on Mondays? Goodness. And then all of these stupid Syllabi and book orders. It's just boring, redundant work. I'm going to work on developing a more effective method of getting this done soon. And I have permission to do so :) Free lunch ain't bad though.

Oh, and my dad wrote a nice little diddy on the bf. I copied it to Drew so he would know. He got pretty excited - but then again he's generally an excited fellow. It's amazing to me how much his personality and attitude have changed my personality and attitude - all for the better I think. It's just so nice to have someone who I can 100% trust. 6 months ago I would have said that was impossible.

I should leave work.......BYE!

much love.
carrie jade

thinking of red birds all day (thanks for your post mom).

Did you know...

2007-11-02T09:30:00.001-04:00

Did you know that Princess Buttercup married Sean Penn? And did you know that Prince Humperdink married Susan Sarandan? AND Fred Savage directs Always Sunny in Phildelphia, the best show on television right now?

Of course I'm referencing Princess Bride characters. If you don't know what I'm talking about please never read this blog again.

:)

much love!

Peace.

2007-11-01T10:18:00.000-04:00

This blog is somewhat a storehouse for quotes and articles I know I will want to return to. Reading my daily checklists of blogs this morning there were two I found more enlightening than usual. A quote from the first:

They acknowledge the obvious truth: Christianity - with over 30% of the world's population - and Islam - with over 20% - together comprise over 50% of the world's people. In light of those numbers, unless Christians and Muslims learn to get along as neighbors, nobody in the world will be secure. Our world's great religions must either allow themselves to be manipulated by political and corporate interests as agents of fear and distrust that predictably lead to war, or they must be converted into agents of peace, justice, and love.

This is not simply another mushy, gushy, least-common-denominator, "I'd like to teach the world to sing" style of feel-good "can't we all just get along." The Muslim leaders acknowledge, "… Islam and Christianity are obviously different religions—and … there is no minimizing some of their formal differences." But then they go on to say, " ... it is clear that the two greatest commandments are an area of common ground and a link between the Qur'an, the Torah, and the New Testament."

This was written by Brian McLaren in reference to a document titled "A Common Word Between Us and You." It was written to Christians by 138 leaders of different denominations Islam from around the world. You can read McLaren's article href="http://blog.beliefnet.com/godspolitics/2007/10/a-word-of-hope-between-us-and.html">here.

The second article I read that stood out comes from a series being written by Bob Massey. He with a team over in India rescuing girls from the sex slave industry running rampant in that country. His posts have been relatively short - just commenting on the events of the day and how they have opened his eyes to this crisis.

Today, his article was titled 'Hm, she's cute'. He tells of how he was being given a tour of the Red Light district and how hard it is to tell which girls are "working" and which are not. He finds himself looking at a particular prostitute and thinking, 'hm, she's cute'. He goes on to point out how thin the line between perp and cop is.

I think this is good for all of us to think about. In this instance, it's EASY for a man to say that the sex slave industry is disgusting. But imagine being immersed in that culture, all of the beautiful girls who just want a few dollars in exchange for something you're wired to think about.

Think about all of the things you stand against. How easy is it for you to KNOW that those things are wrong? Have you ever been immersed in that situation? How easy would it be to step into that territory? How thin is that line that have not crossed?

My hope is that this line of thought will allow you to apply grace to those who oppose your opinions. To step in their shoes - not supporting what they practice, but having compassion on them and their situation.

Have you ever met a girl who had an abortion? I have. And she is broken. My words are spoken a lot more carefully around her and I would benefit from thinking like this more often. Have you ever been friends with a gay man with a broken heart? I have. And I learned that he needs just as much love and compassion as a straight man in the same situation. Have you ever met a Muslim? I have. And she was not evil or violent. She wants the same peace I want. Have you ever talked with a homeless person. I have. And not all of them were lazy. They want out of the system just as much as we don't want to have to see it. love.

All of that is not to say that some how I have done it right. I haven't done anything at all. I just think that many are doing a great injustice to themselves by never experiencing the realities of this world. You do not have to be of the world to be in the world. Being with those who are different from me has perhaps taught me more, first hand, about what it means to love than anything else. And you don't have to go far to meet people like this. They are people you work with, go to school with, see at the mall, pass on the sidewalks...

We are all human. We all mess up. And maybe we shouldn't be so quick to point the finger as we should to love.

I hope that we can all learn to advocate justice in effective, loving ways despite the direction our country and many of it's leaders are taking us.

much love.
carrie jade

3 In 1

2007-10-30T23:56:00.001-04:00

Three in one day! Man oh man I'm startin to blog like my dad. :)

Oh well, it's late and I don't have anyone to talk to. Drew just called with some not so good news. He's in a band and about a month or so ago they booked a show for the day after thanksgiving.

We were supposed to go visit my grandma and grandpa the day after thanksgiving.

So now we'll just have to leave Saturday morning and come back Sunday. Quick trips aren't as fun but it will work.

Oh, and yes, I deleted most of this post. Previously I talked about my little Charlie dog who has cancer and how at first I thought, "He's just a dog" but then on Monday I started to get really upset. That's not actually a picture of him but it's basically what he looked like.

Spring

2007-10-30T15:34:00.000-04:00

I know, it's fall. But I really like the following song. I listened to it on repeat almost the entire way back to Ohio this weekend. It's beautiful and if you can, you should visit The Lions myspace page and listen to it.

Spring

When I was young, I painted in primary colors
Brilliant and bold, with strokes that were simple and strong
Pictures of lovers and fathers and mothers and brothers
Something always goes wrong

Then one by one, I knocked all my paint buckets over
Smeared all my paintings with brushes all dirty and brown
I was sitting alone in the monochrome mess of my failures
And then you came around

In the mess I couldn’t clean
You showed me orange and purple and green…

And now it’s spring, it’s spring!
All of the trees turn green
And now it’s spring, it’s spring!
All of the flowers are growing
In the spring

When it’s all said would I change anything that has happened?
When it’s all done was there one stroke not changed in your hand?
Now I can paint what before I could only imagine
I just don’t understand

How you take each thing I break or lose
And just bring forth something new…

And now it’s spring, it’s spring!
Summer is beckoning
And now it’s spring, it’s spring!
See, what was dead is stirring
In the spring

Well, I had a dream that all ‘round your throne
Stood ten-thousand children with summer clothes on
And we sang of the love that will never grow cold
And we sang a new song
We sang a new song

We sang: “God is making everything new…”

Spring is by far my most favorite season. Although the fall is pretty, there's that looming inevitability that everything will look dead in a month. But then it's Spring and everything is new again. I can't wait!

much love.
carrie jade

So Now I Know

2007-10-30T14:46:00.000-04:00

I heard a rumor once that I had won some award for a funny feature story I wrote. Well, I thought it was kind of a joke but apparently it was worth something to someone.

Anyway, in google-ing my name I came across a web-site announcing what I won. And now I know...

Look under Individual Awards - Feature Story. I beat someone from Baylor!

much love,
carrie jade

That's What She Said

2007-10-26T09:46:00.001-04:00

During my morning Facebook surfing I came across two quotes I really enjoyed. For my own personal future reference:

"I wanna hear a poem where ideas kiss similes so deeply that metaphors get jealous. Where the subject matters so much that adjectives start holding pro-noun rallies at city hall." Steve Coleman (musician)

2- God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I am so far behind that I will never die. - Bill Watterson (Calvin and Hobbes)

Carry on...

much love.
carrie jade

oh, and P.S. Last night, my BF drove 90 miles to cook me dinner. first time i'd had a plain old artichoke since high school. yyyyyuuuuuummmmmmmmmmmmmmyyyyyy!

Ehh...Politics

2007-10-25T09:59:00.000-04:00

People keep asking me who I think I'll vote for. I kind of like to wait until it's closer to the end before I pick someone. I think a lot comes out in those last few weeks that we don't know about now. But I should probably at least start to educate myself on who these folks are.

Jim Wallis wrote an article titled "A Message to All 'Values Voters'" on Tuesday. This is my favorite part:

And this is the key: The biblical prophets tell us that God judges societies not by their gross national product, their military strength, or their cultural dominance, but by their justice and righteousness - especially how they treat the weak and vulnerable.

We know there are multiple threats to human life and dignity that suggest a new moral agenda that could bring us together:

Strengthening marriage and families
Renewing the moral fabric of our culture
Overcoming extreme global poverty and disease, as well as unnecessary poverty at home
Ending human trafficking
Healing the wounds of racism
Protecting God's creation
Finding a better path to national and global security
Advancing a consistent ethic of the sanctity of life

If those we could agree on these basic principles, we could reshape American politics - and, with God's help, we might change some of the big things that politics has been unable to.

It's a good article. You can read the whole thing here

much love.
carrie jade

Either Way

2007-10-24T14:52:00.000-04:00

I don't know why I started thinking about this again but I did. I think it's the book I just read. At any rate, if you don't know me too well I need to tell you the following in order for this to make sense: A lot of my friends call me Miss Practical.

Some examples, most of my shirts are black and my pants are plain old jeans or plain old khaki. Almost all of my clothes can be mixed and matched and require very little thought.

I own very few high heels. Of course sometimes a girl needs her power shoes but for the most part, they're just unrealistic, to me.

I wear the same jewelry every day and I carry the same purse until it wears out. Accessorizing on a daily basis stresses me out so I stay simple.

I drive a Neon. My dream car? No. Why dream about cars? But I drive a lot (not as much as I used to) so the gas mileage is beneficial. I think it's precious that I don't have power locks, windows or cruise control. Keeps me humble...or something.

I like plain old Bic Pens. No gel, no clickies, no grippies, no colors other than blue or black.

Whenever asked to make copies, I make them front and back. It is ridiculous to me that people make one sided copies unless there's some special reason for it.

I don't wear skirts or lotion or perfume or socks other than the athletic ones from old navy - even with dress shoes.

I color my hair to match my eyebrows because it makes more sense than my natural hair color.

I hang very few things on the wall - messiness is one thing, clutter is another.

I am no longer a pack rat. If I find something that I haven't looked at in the last four years, I get rid of it or throw it away (unless it's an American Girl doll with $1000000 in accessories that my daughter will love one day).

So you get the point...and I could go on and on but I'm bothered by it.

All of this points to how I used to handle almost every situation. I could probably be accused of under-analyzing it most cases. I just think that in every dilemma all you have to do is say, "I have two options in front me. I can either do one or the other."

Chocolate cake or vanilla, simple as that. Steak or chicken. Date him or don't. Talk about it or avoid it. Khakis or black pants.

Not everything is black and white. I realize that. But I don't dwell. I have the ability to dismiss things from my mind almost completely.

Okay, instead of erasing all of this I'll just take a lot of it back. For the most part, most of this has been true. There are things I dwell on and can't let go of. I guess they just push everything out of the way. I can't have more than 3 major issues in my life at one time. I prioritize my problems. For now I dwell on my grandma being dead and the phone call i got from Shane this week. That's all. Whether or not people who come to the Summit get CEUs or not doesn't matter. Why are we still talking about it? Will someone just say it's going to be one way or another and leave it at that? I will make the decision if need be.

And why why why do we have to just wait and see what happens? Why can't someone just say right now what we should do?

It's either one way or the other. Drew and I have this thing (we have a lot of strange things actually) where instead of wondering what the other is thinking we say "1, 2, 3, go" and the other person has all of one second to say exactly what they're thinking. For example, if we've been talking about where to eat for 20 minutes, one of us says the magic words and the other honestly says what they want...and get real, you know that no matter how many times you say "i don't care what we eat" you know what you really want.

And what do you know, the perfect song just came on..

"Either Way" Wilco

Maybe the sun will shine today
The clouds will blow away
Maybe I won't feel so afraid
I will try to understand
Either way

Maybe you still love me
Maybe you don't
Either you will or you won't
Maybe you just need some time alone
I will try to understand
Everything has its plan
Either way
I'm gonna stay
Right for you

Maybe the sun will shine today
The clouds will roll away
Maybe I won't be so afraid
I will understand everything has its plan
Either way

All that to say, most of the things we spend so much time stressing about don't really matter (coming from me probably makes you want to laugh, if practical is my first name, stress is definitely my middle name). Either way, life is going to go on. Either way, it's not in our hands. Either way, we can only do as good as we know how. And either way, we have the ability to chose one way or the other.

this was stupid. i have too many thoughts. but I'm a real person and this is really what I'm thinking.

much love and peace.
carrie jade

Tragic

2007-10-22T11:19:00.000-04:00

This past weekend I went to IU with my boyfriend and his friends to watch his band play. Yesterday, on the way home, the usual 2 and a half hour drive took us almost 5 hours. I-69 North was closed for almost 4 hours due to an accident invoving a 17 passenger van. The Journal Gazette reported the following:

*Melvin Fisher, age 39, Rockville, father and van driver: deceased.
*Savilla Fisher, age unknown, Rockville, mother: deceased.
*Ruben Fisher, age 16, Rockville, son: deceased.
*Christian Fisher, age 11, Rockville, son: deceased.
*Eli Fisher, age 1, Rockville, son: deceased.
*Leon Fisher, age 13, Rockville, son: injured, Methodist Hospital in Indianapolis.
*Melvin Fisher Jr., age 9, Rockville, son: injured, Ball Memorial Hospital.
*Steven Fisher, age 4, Rockville, son: injured, Lutheran Hospital in Fort Wayne.
*Solome Fisher, age 7, Rockville, daughter: injured, Riley Children’s Hospital in Indianapolis.
*Joseph Lengacher, age unknown, New Haven, father: injured, Ball Memorial Hospital.
*Ida Lengacher, age 32, New Haven, wife: injured, Methodist Hospital.
*Matthew Lengacher, age 9, New Haven, son, injured: Ball Memorial Hospital in Muncie.
*Mary Lengacher, age 7, New Haven, injured: Methodist Hospital.
*Nathan Lengacher, age 5, New Haven, son, injured: Methodist Hospital.
*Julia Lengacher, age 3, New Haven, daughter, injured: Methodist Hospital.
*John Lengacher, age 1, New Haven, son, injured: Methodist Hospital.

They were all Amish. A man related to the Lengacher family said, “All we can believe is that the Lord had his hand on it and that his ways are not our ways,” he said. “I would not choose this way, but his ways are as far above ours as the heavens are from the Earth.”

We serve a big God. And he is powerful. May we never forget that.

My prayers are with this family and community.

much love,
carrie jade

The Word

2007-10-17T15:15:00.000-04:00

Don't worry, happiness will come. But just one more:

It's not secret that I'm a fan of Stephen Colbert. I also don't think it's much of a secret anymore that he has dramatic influence on our society - I believe he calls it the "Colbert Effect" which is similar to the "Oprah Effect".

Anyway, today's article of the day on Wikipedia has to do with Stephen's definition of the word 'truthiness'. Here's a link: TRUTHINESS

And here's a teaser:

Truthiness is tearing apart our country, and I don't mean the argument over who came up with the word…

It used to be, everyone was entitled to their own opinion, but not their own facts. But that's not the case anymore. Facts matter not at all. Perception is everything. It's certainty. People love the President because he's certain of his choices as a leader, even if the facts that back him up don't seem to exist. It's the fact that he's certain that is very appealing to a certain section of the country. I really feel a dichotomy in the American populace. What is important? What you want to be true, or what is true?…

Truthiness is 'What I say is right, and [nothing] anyone else says could possibly be true.' It's not only that I feel it to be true, but that I feel it to be true. There's not only an emotional quality, but there's a selfish quality.

I wish I had known about this concept when I was doing my research methods paper at HU. Extremely facinating concept for a Comm Major.

Carry on...much love.
Carrie Jade

Unhappy Blog

2007-10-17T09:33:00.000-04:00

I'm definitely planning a happy blog for this afternoon (how could I not after mom and Joan's uplifting posts?). But as I was sifting through the blogs that I read every morning I was astounded to read the following facts taken from Scot McKnight's blog (jesuscreed.org) which he has taken from Brian McLaren's new book, Everything Must Change:

So, what does this redemptive story of violence cost us and what does it look like?

Here McLaren enters the world of numbers and stats and figures:

1. Since 1940, the US alone has spent $5.48 trillion developing nuclear weapons. The “strategic sufficiency” — words of Kissinger — continues in an arms race. We can now destroy ten planet earths.

2. The US spends $100 million per day “to keep its weapons poised and ready for use in a preemptive strike” (166).

3. 20% of our fiscal budget is for military.

4. Half of our US national debt is military-related ($2.9 of $5.6 trillion).

5. In 2003 the US military budget exceeded the next fifteen nations combined.

6. US spends 2 billion dollars per day on military.

Weapons are also a business; violence therefore becomes a industry. We produce lots of weapons in order to sell them to countries, most of whom are not democratic. “The purpose of the US security system is to maintain the inequity of US prosperity” (168).

If we invested 10% of the military budget in foreign aid and development, we alone could cover the basic needs of the world’s poor. He enters then into the Shock and Awe program and sees us therefore in a war not on terror but in a war of terror.

In the 20th Century … 43 million military personnel were killed in war; 62 million civilians.

wow.

Quote Worthy Quote

2007-10-12T11:06:00.000-04:00

Apparently I haven't been thinking the last two days. :)

I have been reading though. I'm re-reading "Life of Pi." It's really good. The first time I read it was for my Religions of the World class. This time it's just for fun. Here's a part I like early in the book:

"The pandit spoke first. "Mr. Patel, Piscine's piety is admirable. In these throubled times it's good to see a boy so keen on God. We all agree on that." The imam and the priest nodded. "But he can't be a Hindu, a Christian and a Muslin. It's impossible. He much choose."...

..."Hmmm, Piscine?" Mother nudged me. "How do you feel about the question?"

"Bapu Ghandi said, 'All religions are true.' I just want to love God," I blurted out, and looked down, red in the face...

Chapter 25

And that wasn't the end of it. There are always those who take it upon themselves to defend God, as if Ultimate Reality, as if the sustaining frame of existence, were something weak and helpless. These people walk by a widow deformed by leprosy begging for a few paise, walk by children dressed in rags living in the street, and they think, "Business as usual." But if they perceive a slight against God, it is a different story. Their faces go red, their chests heave mightily, they sputter angry words. The degree of their indignation is astonishing. Their resolve is frightening.

These people fail to realize that it is on the inside that God must be defended, not on the outside. They should direct their anger at themselves. For evil in the open is but evil from within that has been let out. The main battlefield for good is not the open ground of the public arena but the small clearing of each heart. Meanwhile, the lot of widows and homeless chidlren is very hard, and it is to their defence, not God's, that the self-rightneous should rush.

Once an oaf chased me away fromt he Great Mosque. When I went to church the preist glared at me so that I could not feel the peace of Christ. A Brahmin sometimes shooed me away from darshan. My religious doings were reported to my parents in the hushed, urgent tones of treason revealed.

As if this small-mindedness did God any good.

To me, religion is about our dignity, not our depravity.

I stopped attending Mass at Our Lady of Immaculate Conception and went instead to Our Lady of Angels. I no longer lingered after Friday prayer among my brethren. I went to temple at crowded times when the Brahmins were too distracted to come between God and me."

(This was taken from pages 69-71 in "Life of Pi" a novel by Yann Martel.)

Now, I realize that this book is just a novel but it raised in me a thought I had never thought (i am thinking afterall). God does not need us to defend him but to defend those suffering injustice and to do so in the name of Him. God is God.

And maybe if everyone stopped trying to prove that they are right and everyone else is wrong, more people would want to go to church. Maybe if we let God do the work we would actually get it right. Maybe if we stopped arguing about how to do things and instead focused on why we do things, they would actually be meaningful.

Not all the novels I read are worthless afterall. To further prove my point, J.K. Rowling, the author of Harry Potter wrote, "Differences of habit and language are nothing at all if our aims are identical and our hearts are open."

peace and much love.
carrie jade

p.s. In searching for a photo I discovered that Yann Martel also wrote The Time Travelers Wife, The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime, and The Secret Life of Bees. What a genius! I had never put all those together. Read all of them!

I've Got Another Confession to Make...

2007-10-10T21:05:00.000-04:00

I was just thinking about things again (wenesday is usually a no TV day because Thursdays are TV only days so I've basically just been sitting here thinking).

My guy has been brought up Catholic - well mostly. He went to a Catholic high school and from what I understand his grandmother is extremely Catholic and basically, to him, religion has only ever equaled Catholicism. We talk about this a lot and he's always very interested to know about my faith tradition. One conversation we had that has kind of carried with me was the first conversation we had about...duh duh duh...confession.

It all started when he asked if it was weird to do confession with my dad. Then I explained to him that most protestants just confess right to God and don't go through a middle man at all. I'll spare you the rest of the details because 1. they might be boring and 2. they are kind of personal.

He asked why we don't do confession formally. I don't really have an answer. And, in the beginning, I didn't think there really needed to be one. But then, this evening, as I was reading James i whipped out the good old Message paraphrase.

Maybe this isn't legal but the intro to James says this:

"When Christian believers gather in churches, everything that can go wrong sooner or later does. outsiders, on observing this, conclude that there is nothing to the religion business except, perhaps, business - and dishonest business at that. Insiders see it differently. Just as a hostpital collects the sickunder one roof and labels them as such, the church collects sinners. Many of the people outside the hostpital are every bit as sick as the ones inside, but their illnesses are either undiagnosed or disguised. It's similar with sinners outside the church. So Christian churches are not, as a rule, model communities of good behavior. Ther are, rather, places where human misbehavior is brought out in the open, faced, and dealt with..."

Whoa Whoa Whoa Mr. Eugene Peterson. What church do you go to?

I love my home church. I love my church in Findlay and there have been churches in my past that I have enjoyed (and some that creep me out). But I have yet to be at a church where "human misbehavior is brought out in the open, faced, and dealt with." Churches are just about the best place in the world for sinners to disguise their "illnesses" so that they go undiagnosed. Too many people, both inside the church and out, think that people who go to church are okay because they go to church.

My thought is this: maybe the Catholics have got it right with this idea of formal confession. Don't get me wrong, I don't think that all Catholics honestly confess all of their sins or confess regurly enough for it to really make a difference. And maybe saying a Hail Mary doesn't mean much but in the evangelical church everything is maybe a little too personal. People often don't want to pry into your personal life. Just say the quiet prayer...confess your sins to Jesus and repent. If the church encourages you to confess your sins to someone other than God himself, it's to your accountability partner - yup, just one other person.

I don't know. I don't come to conclusions much with my thoughts. But I do know that a lot of people use church as a bandaid to cover up their sin. I don't feel like throwing out specific examples (not names but situations) because I don't want to offend someone. But lets say you're an active mother of your child's PTA and you're also a raging alcoholic. Doesn't it look great to everyone who sees you at church on Sunday. I mean, if you can just pull it together for that 1 and 15 mintues on Sunday morning no one will bother you - even if they know.

It's called the spiral of silence. Everyone thinks its someone else's responsibility to hold the other church members accountable. But, lets not think that people aren't talking about it. Watch out because behind your back everyone knows exactly how to fix your problem. It's just that they would never force you to bring it to light.

Now I'm just getting cynical.

Oh, and someone recently said something along the lines of if you can't define Christianity you have no place talking about it or something...I read this verse in the paraphrase and I liked it:

"Anyone who sets himself up as "religious" by talking a good game is self-deceived. This kind of religion is hot air and only hot air. Real religion, the kind that passes muster before God the Father, is this: Reach out to the homeless and loveless in their plight, and guard against corruption from the godless world." James 1:27

Of course, I'm probably not a real Christian for reading The Message. :)

much love.
carrie jade

P.S. I bought Reisens at Wal Mart this evening. I forgot how amaizingly wonderful and delicious they are. Go buy some.

perfect.

2007-10-09T21:22:00.000-04:00

I was just thinking...

I was just thinking about the last few years of my life. There have been a lot of times where I just really didn't think life made any sense and all and that it was all stupid and I couldn't wait until God either told me what the heck to do or I died (not in a morbid way, and definitely not a suicidal way - more of an impatient, can we please hurry and get this over with way). Honestly, i still felt this way until about July.

Quitting my job that I basically hated (actually, I liked my job, I just couldn't deal with the atmosphere that being a server brings with it) started it all. I think, looking back, that quitting my job without having any other real plan was my way of saying that it was time to start over. I remember laying in bed that morning just praying over an over that ever so common prayer of "God, I can't do this and I need your help." I have rarely taken the time to look back. My life has continued to get better and better and make more and more sense since that dredded Tuesday in early July.

I also think that one of the other most important things what to stop looking for things that I thought I needed to make me happy. I stopped trying to force a relationship that didn't seem to likely...even though I still care a lot for this certain HU boy. But I care about him in that I can pray for him and wish him nothing but the best of luck as he follows the path that God has placed in front of him. Honestly, I don't think he has a clue...really, I think only Danielle and maybe Kelly know who I'm talking about. I also stopped placing the blame of my confusion on people and places that I now realize have helped me get to where I am now.

I decided to just let my life go. Just walk on. And I've walked into some lovely situations. The most obvious, of course, being my new job. Coming back to Findlay after nothing but happy childhood memories before has been so uplifting. I love this town - even if it's boring and I spend most of my time in my apartment with my iPod, my Netflix and my books. What a time to really focus on who I am and who I want to be....and enjoy my time a lone, because who knows how much longer that will last (don't worry mom and dad, I'm not talking abotu any time soon, but in a year or two anyway).

There's one other amazing someone in my life who i have been hesitant to write much of anything about. I've always like to keep that part of my life to myself. But this one is so fun to share. I love being with him around my parents because they're all so important to me...it's kind of like I want to brag to them abotu how great he is and brag to him abotu how great they are. I wish I was closer and Isaac was closer so that it could happen more often. It's just strange to me how much better everything in my life is. When something bad happens, I know I can depend on him to either tell me I'm being silly and it's not that bad, to tell me that maybe I need to consider that the other person is right, to tell me I'm probably creating something out of nothing or to totally support how I feel and help me solve the problem. It's so nice to feel like he would do anything I ask. It's so much fun to do random things, like his best friends grandmothers 70th birthday party with him. Its so nice to have someone who can support himself and likes being able to take me out to dinner and to movies and even to Cedar Point and I honestly think he enjoys paying for it all. And he's goofy and fun and hyper and always ready to go do something like play catch at the park or sit and watch Always Sunny in Philidelphia for an hour or so. He gets my sense of humor. He confronts issues and we can talk - not argue - about our differences and how to deal with them. He has goals. He loves his family. He is so so responsible and so mature when he needs to be. He's the perfect blend of goofy and serious. He's educated and values learning. I can trust him more than I have ever been able to trust anyone. I've never met anyone who doesn't like him - honestly. Whenever I meet one of his friends they tell me how great he is and how glad they are to see him happy. Whenever I tell someone I'm dating him they always tell me how great he is and how lucky I am. That says a lot, ya know? He always seems interested in what I have to say and seems to want to know about why I am the way I am and why I think what I think. He's so positive. I don't think he knows how to be negative and when I'm down, or sad, or depressed or whatever you want to call it he has this way of turnning everything around and making it seem not so bad. He makes it a point to tell me I'm beautiful every day (part of that started as a joke but I don't think it's such a joke any more). One time, on a saturday he accidently said I was the most high maintenace girl he ever dated. When that upset me, he said that "high maintenace" probably meant different thing to each of us and he didn't mean it in a bad way. Then, on the following Tuesday I received a text in the middle of the day of a better explanation of what he was trying to say. Really, I had totally forgotten and 4 days later he was still thinking of exactly what it was he was trying to say. So thoughtful. He likes being on the same page abotu everything. And even though he doesn't know my family very well he asks abotu them all the time. And even though he doesn't know the people I work with really well, when he found out a lady at work was having to put her mother int he nursing home he told me to tell her she was really pretty for a 32 year old (she's actually 52) and I honestly think it made her whole day better. He once started a count down 54 and a half hours before we would see each other. He remembers almost everything i say and says things like "tubular" and "surfs up". He includes me in his thoughts about the future. He has really helped me in my process of overcoming impatience and being defensive. When one of my best friends first met him she said that it was strange how much he really made her feel comfortable (something she rarely feels).

I don't know what all it is I'm trying to say in this rant. It's just what started this whole thought process. I guess I feel grown up right now. I live by myself, I have a real job, and I have someone who makes it seem worth while and who makes me want to succeed. He encourages me and supports me and I can only recall one day since became a daily part of my life that I was sad (and it had nothing to do with him, sometimes I reflect on my grandma's death to the point that being happy seems wrong). It's just funny to think that I met him my sophomore year of college on 19th and Washington in Bloomington, IN. Who would have thought....

And who ever thought I would write a sappy blog about my feelings like this...that's Isaac's job. :)

My phone is ringing. At 10 every night we have a phone date. Sometimes they last 10 minutes, sometimes 2 hours.

much love.
carrie jade

oh, and i've been in a weird "google random words" mood today. I googled love and found this, I liked it:

"Love, the strongest and deepest element in all life, the harbinger of hope, of joy, of ecstasy; love, the defier of all laws, of all conventions; love, the freest, the most powerful moulder of human destiny; how can such an all-compelling force be synonymous with that poor little State and Church-begotten weed, marriage?
Free love? As if love is anything but free! Man has bought brains, but all the millions in the world have failed to buy love. Man has subdued bodies, but all the power on earth has been unable to subdue love. Man has conquered whole nations, but all his armies could not conquer love. Man has chained and fettered the spirit, but he has been utterly helpless before love. High on a throne, with all the splendor and pomp his gold can command, man is yet poor and desolate, if love passes him by. And if it stays, the poorest hovel is radiant with warmth, with life and color. Thus love has the magic power to make of a beggar a king. Yes, love is free; it can dwell in no other atmosphere."

-Emma Goldman, "Marriage and Love" in Anarchism and Other Essays (1911)

On a Happy Note

2007-10-09T11:42:00.000-04:00

Anyone watch Monday Night Football last evening?

I didn't. But I have an amazing boyfriend who sent me play by play texts almost the whole game. I even had roughly 4 other friends point out how terrible Romo played.

That being said, SCORE BOARD, SCORE BOARD, SCORE BOARD.

Don't get me wrong, the Cowboys probably didn't deserve to win. I always like to point out to my friends the no matter what, Dallas is America's team. After last night I raised the idea that maybe they are God's team as well.

Then I came to work, and the President of Winebrenner Theological Seminary said, "The Cowboys are obviously God's team." So, it's official. Dr. Draper said it - let it be writting in stone:

THE DALLAS COWBOYS ARE GOD'S TEAM!!

Oh, and then Dr. Dave said that he was a Yankees fan. Someone (not mentioning names) responded by saying that he "like communists more than the Yankees."

Obviously, the HLC/ATS focus visit went well and everyone is breathing a sigh of relief. You should be jealous of my job, I work in an AMAZING place. Drew was here yesterday and he commented, "everyone's so smiley here." It's true. It's uplifting, it's wonderful, and I have been blessed.

Peace my friends, and much love,
Carrie Jade

P.S. I will only accept positive comments. All negativity can be taken elsewhere. :)

Thank you

2007-10-04T18:11:00.000-04:00

I mysteriously got a book in the mail today that I did not order.

Thank you mysterious book sender.

much love
carrie jade

p.s. My dad is cooler than yours because I bet your dad doesn't pay attention to conversation details and send you relevant books like mine does. :)

Interesting stuff

2007-10-04T16:38:00.000-04:00

I love the Colbert Report and it's probably one of the 3 reasons I wish I had cable. Anyway, I can watch it online. This interview with Tony Campolo is neat:

http://www.comedycentral.com/motherload/index.jhtml?ml_video=59604

hey dad, how do i get this to show up as a video and not a link?

Computer Issues.

2007-09-27T12:30:00.000-04:00

My computer has been sick the last couple of days. I think it's depressed or something. Anyway, it keeps trying to kill itself and it's really taking a toll on my ability to do anything. The problem seems to stem from Microsoft Outlook and therefore I can't check my work email. Maybe I should just go home...

I've been thinking about blogging a lot lately. There's just been a lot on my mind I suppose. The annual theological problem for the seminary where I work is "What is Conversion?" We base three Theological Summits (lecture series/discussion) around this problem and I sit on the planning committee for these summits. Students love these and they have been a real asset to the overall dvelopment and academic integrity of this institution. We meet about twice a month or so in planning this event (the next one in January 8th) so I've been sitting through a lot of discussions about not only what conversion means to us individually, and a comittee and as an institution but also the controversy that seems to be taking place surrounding this topic.

Basically, there are three different types of conversion (to my understanding):
1-Liturgical (for many, you are converted at baptism). This type of conversion is most evident in the Catholic and Lutheran faith traditions.

2- Socialized. Being a communications major and being raised in a Christian home, this makes the most sense to me. What it says is that some Christians are conditioned into their faith. Their conversion just happens by being raised in the church. Scot McKnight uses the phrase "gentle nods of the soul." This type of conversion is often thought of as being communal. It happens within a faith community.

3-The Big Bang. Okay, probably not a very good phrase to use within the context of Christian Conversion. I'm using it because it creates this picture of a dramatic event that alters the course of one's existence as it was previous to the event. Think the Billy Graham crusades or miraculously getting over a meth addiction. These people can pinpoint the exact moment in time that they were converted.

Another key issues in conversion is how a person equates conversion to salvation. For some, these are two seperate things and others fail to see a difference. Ultimately, I believe, salvation comes from Christ, for all of us. Being converted, although divine intervention is evident, is a choice, or a process we, as humans, chose.

But back to the three different "types" of conversion. I guess I am frustrated to hear so many think that "true conversion" is only one of those variations. Seriously, some people think that if you can't remember the exact day and hour that you were converted, then you really weren't. I admire my parents and teachers, especially my college professors, for teaching me how to think critically. My ability to think critically has saved me from thinking that I have not experienced conversion and therefore have not been saved because I can't pinpoint a moment.

I thought about blogging what I believe to be my conversion process this far in life, but...nah. I'll write it down for my own personal gain and then probably throw it away so no one can find it one day and write a book. I tend to write things that make sense to me but terribly offend others (like using the phrase 'big bang' to explain what some feel is the only way to be saved).

I was often jealous of people who's conversion was dramatic. You know, overcoming drug addictions, prostitution, alcoholism...escaping death...being miraculously healed...but I think I have been blessed. Don't get me wrong, there are defintiely specific moments in time where I can recall being challenged or enlightened more than others (gentle nods). I also can't really recall a moment where I didn't know God and then all of a sudden I did.

anyway. this wasn't at all what i meant to blog about today. maybe i'll write about that later. it has to do with going beyond the minimum requirements.

oh, and my computer has been miarculously healed...so far.

much love.
carrie jade

Family

2007-09-21T09:07:00.000-04:00

I just want everyone to know that I have the best family in the world.

You'll never meet a woman more patient and lovely as my mother.
You'll never meet a man as smart and intellectual as my father.
You'll never meet a man as compassionate or who has more potential to change the world as my brother.

Isaac and I were very blessed when God put us under the care of our parents. They're amazing. I don't know how they do it. They've done the right parental things when the two of us were acting like idiots but they've never seemed like typical parents to me. It's like we're a part of a team and they're the captians because they're older and more experienced. Isaac and I are the new kids on the team. They don't tell us what to do but they give us what we need to succeed. See how there's a difference between us and them but essentially we're all in this together?

It's a perfect system. They should write a book - or at least offer some coaching lessons. Too many parents try to control their children and then the kids end up all messed up.

I'm not trying to say me and Isaac are perfect. We screw up and probably always will. But I feel like I was very well prepared for life. I think that's the bottom line in parenting - to prepare your children to go off and live good lives. And there are a lot of things I'm still clueless about (taxes, car insurance, student loans...money in general), but I have a good enough relationship with my parents that I know they're always there. They didn't kick me out when I turned 18 and hope that they had prepared me well enough to live. They sent me out into the world with a good cell phone plan.

I hope things never change. I don't know, I don't talk to Isaac as much as I used to but we're both so dang busy. The bottom line about him is that in moving around like we did, he's the only friend I have who's known basically all the details the whole time. There is a lot of advice that only he has the credentials to give. My favorite thing to call him is little brother. He's bigger than me, yes, but I can't call him my younger brother. He seems so much older than me most of the time. I am very fortunate to be able to look up to my little brother. I look forward to the adventures of becoming real adults with him...I get to mess things up so he knows what not to do. :) I think I'll let him get married first...

I should get back to work...Fridays are rough because it's basically me and a bunch of UF students. They must have a test today. All the little kiddies are laying in the atruim with their noses burried in their notebooks. It's cute. Freshman are so young looking...I must be getting old.

much love.
carrie jade

Boo yah.

2007-09-13T14:27:00.000-04:00

I'm taking a break from the awesomeness of creating the Student directory.

I think I found a fixer to the troubled feeling I had after seeing that news report about Mother Theresa a while back.

Scot McKnight has been writing about it on his blog Jesuscreed.org. He posted this quote:

“If I ever become a saint — I will surely be one of ‘darkness.’ I will continually be absent from heaven — to light the light of those in darkness on earth” (230).

It's from her book, Come Be My Light.

When I heard the news report the used this quote, only it was shown, "If I ever become a saint - I will surely be one of 'darkness.' I will continually be absent from heaven."

See what a difference that made? Unbelievable. Thanks to Scot McKnight! Oh, and I emailed him this morning...I don't think I've ever proof read and email so many times before hitting the send button...

much love homies
carrie jade

I (heart) Britney.

2007-09-11T13:05:00.000-04:00

The most viewed story on cnn.com for today, the 6 year aniversary of 9/11 is a story about Britney's performance on this past weekend's MTV VMAs.

Although I don't actually own any of her cds, I do somewhat enjoy the music of Ms. Spears. It's entertaining at least. She's good at what she does.

Her life, on the other hand, is less than entertaining to me. She's been through some rough times and people just won't let her go. Can you honestly blame the girl for freaking out the way she did - or any celbrity for that matter. Don't get me wrong, I think that placing yourself in the limelight you have to somewhat expect that most normal people won't like you. Everyone's going to be jealous of you and to make themselves feel better they will bring you down. That's life.

But come on. Britney Spears is not fat. Especially after having two children, she's still got it going on. I would love to look like her after having two children. Maybe her choice of wardrobe wasn't the best but at least she's still got her confidence.

I think we're all lucky, as a culture, that more celebrities don't try to kill themselves (cue Needle in the Hay by Elliot Smith). Britney was obviously a little more than nervous to get back on stage and perform at one of the most watch awards shows after everything she's been dealing with. Props to Britney as far as I'm concerned. Maybe someone needs to tell her that boozing is not the way to calm her nerves, I'll give critics that much.

I just think it's funny the way we act like famous people aren't people. I few weeks ago my dad told us to pray for someone outside of our community. He suggested Michael Vic. I was telling someone about that and they said "why would you pray for michael vic?" I don't know, I think as Christians we could all pray a lot harder for people outside of our communities. If we can pray for the orphans, the homeless and the hungry, why can't we pray for celebrities like Paris, Britney and Michael Vic? I'd say they just might be qualify as broken people.

much love,
carrie jade

................

2007-09-07T16:52:00.000-04:00

I still feel like poo. Allergies are not a good thing to have - especially when you live in a town that was recently flooded in unnaturally hot temperatures. It's almost as if a sheet of mold lays over everything. You can certainly smell the mold.

Two positive notes, however.
1-Yesterday I found out that for 100% sure I am Scot McKnight's contact with the seminary involving his travels and accomidations for the Summit. That's a pretty big deal. I better read at least one more of his books before January 8th rolls around.
2-I got my copy of the Andy Sheer Quartet cd in the mail this week. In and Out was originally my favorite but Bring Me Water is creepin up. I can't believe I paid a measley $5 for this. Beautiful!

Oh, and the guy from the grad school called me today. I'm meeting with him at 9:30 on Tuesday. Time to get this show on the road.

alright, my sniffly nosed, itchy eyed, sore throated self is peacing out of this joint.

much love.
carrie jade

Update

2007-09-06T11:13:00.000-04:00

There you go dad.

Link

2007-09-05T14:46:00.000-04:00

I watch the news at night. Usually Dateline or something like that - I only get two channels so I dont' have much of a choice.

A week or so ago the ran a story about the "secret life of Mother Theresa." The way they spun the story made me pretty upset and I meant to write about it. Her big secret made her a lot more real to me. It was very reassuring. I hope you'll take the time to read the following story:

http://www.relevantmagazine.com/god_article.php?id=7408

I have a sinus infection and it's making me miserable.

"peace begins with a smile" - mama T

much love.

So much for the drought

2007-08-22T08:41:00.000-04:00

Work called this morning and told me not to bother even trying to get there. These are two pictures from my town yesterday.

As I wrote before, i get stressed really easy. Today is not going well. Pictures of Findlay were just on the Today Show. See, it's still raining. The river is already 6.5 inches above the flood level and only 1 foot away from cresting. When this happens, the flood really starts and everything gets worse. 80 people are without a place to live...so far. Rescue crews are helping evacuate people and they're driving jet skis and boats down the road.

To top it off, the news just told me that a helicopter crashed in Iraq and 14 soldiers were killed. It was a mechanical error but Iraq news keeps making me cry. One of the people I call my "favorites" is in Iraq now. He won't be home until at least february. When soldiers die, can we please know who it is so I don't have to wait for an email from him telling me he's okay? I talked to this person almost every single day and saw him at least twice a week all summer. Missing him is enough to deal with.

Since a week or so ago I promised to never ever end a blog on a bad note, Brad Pitt is still changing the world. I know a lot of people think he's an idiot, and maybe he doesn't make a lot of good personal choice, and maybe Angelina left him - whatever, I just really think it's great that he's using what he has to change the world. He doesn't even publicize as much as he could, i have a feeling. His status alone gets him free publicity and I think he seems really humble. He seems so passionate. I love that he gets angry during interviews when the reporter tries to ask him celebrity gossip type questions. That's not what he wants to talk about, that's not what he cares about. Maybe it's all an act, he just seems really real. I think it's great that in his age...maybe a little older than my dad, maybe a little younger...he's not trying to stay famous by doing stupid lame gimicky movies. He's building homes in new orleans for the displaced poor. I mean really, imagine being homeless after the hurricane and Brad Pitt walks up and says he wants to build you a house - an eco friendly home affordable for low income families to maintain.

He says, "we won't be able to bring back their photos and they're memories but we can bring them justice."

Brad claims it is a great injustice that the government thinks they're solving the problem by building giving the homeless these crappy trailors to live in. He claims that he decided to start Global Green after having a conversation with an old man who thought he did what he was supposed to do after the storm. This man got a job and started helping out with Katrina relief but his family is still displaced and he's still homeless. Brad also claims that Katrina was a man-made storm, not nature, and the government is turning their backs.

I just think it's really great. I mean, here we have World's Sexiest Man trying to hold our country accountable for the decisions made in the past. And he's not just pointing fingers, he's saying fine, if you aren't going to make it right, i'm going to try. I need to find myself a Brad Pitt to marry...

MUCH LOVE!

Under water

2007-08-21T20:40:00.000-04:00

My city is under water. literally.

it rained and it rained and it rained. i got to work this morning just fine but the usual 5 minute trip home took me nearly 20 minutes. road after road was closed due to the fact that it was covered in water.

yeah, it sucked that i couldn't get home. but there were much bigger problems. 75 was closed from findlay to lima. no one could get into town, no one could leave. i didn't get my mail today. emergency vehicles couldn't get anywhere easily. and driving through downtown...there was people everywhere. i bet a lot of folks couldn't work.

and to top my 20 minute ride home, i worked a 12 hour day. well, 13 if you count the breakfast i went to at UF.

man oh man.

but;
- i got a super cool UF bag full of goodies
- i got a yummy breakfast, lunch and dinner for FREE!
- only 3 people couldn't come to orientation
- orientation went very well!
- i had chocolate cake waiting for me at home
- i got to take my heels off and rest my feet which is one of the best feelings in the world. sometimes i wear my heels to work just because i know how good it will feel later when i get to take em off.
- working 5 extra hours means i get to take 5 hours off another day (probably will get to go help isaac move in and dewy is excited to come with me!)
- and my phone call should be coming soon! :)
- and, when jim davison closed orientation with prayer, he had us all stand and raise our hands. i was really cool. everyone seems really excited to come to school next week! and i'm excited to have some company in the building.

life is good despite the flood. i'm just glad i wasn't around when Noah built the arc. when the radio told me that its supposed to rain more and that the rivers will most likely overflow on top of what we have now, i almost had a panic attack. luckily my apartment is second story so the worst case scenario is that i have to hang out here for a day or two.

please pray for those who are seriously affected by the flood. a lot of people i work with are really suffering. one guy just finished his basement and woke up to 7 inches this morning. goodness.

much love homies.
carrie jade

I needed a break

2007-08-15T15:10:00.001-04:00

So this is what I did, and this is what I am:

They called me, "The Cheif." I could get used to that.